• Shaking off the frost and welcoming the new season

    Gross out factor in 3…2…1…

    We shed 9 pounds of dead skin every year—

    Now take a brief moment to compose yourself from that unnecessary fact that you did not want to know. Do I have your attention now? The gross out factor was merely to emphasize the point that as humans, experiencing life, we are always transitioning from one phase to the next. Our bodies are constantly shedding anew. Bringing out a brighter life that lies underneath. As unfortunate and difficult that transitions might be, from one season to the next. They are inevitable.

    We are now in a transition period friends. From the change of one season to the other, the weather shifts, our diets change, our activities change and a new sport comes into season. The leaves change from green to yellow to brown and back to green again as new life sprouts from their roots.

    Whether simple or difficult transitions are inevitable. There’s no way to prevent these season changes from happening. But we can see them coming, and we can accept them with open arms— ready to deal with whatever comes in their wake.

    Shake off the frost

    If you live in a climate that experiences frost or snow, you might be able to relate to this a little bit more than this desert soul. But I’ve always loved the image of flowers springing up from the cold frozen ground, breaking way for spring time to come. The new blooms know that despite the cold conditions, that their time is here, to sprout and flower to be enjoyed by us or by the insects on the ground passing by. The flowers know that the time will come to to wilt away, but for the time being, this is their time to sprout and bloom. The frost experiences a transition to. Used to being snuggled up to their fellow icicle buddies, the geometric artwork will eventually melt into nourishing sustenance for the ground and for the very flowers that are parting them from their companions.

    When we look all around us we see the demonstration of transition. If this next season is presenting a hesitant transition for you, I encourage you to go in with open eyes and an accepting heart. It’s going to happen whether or not we are ready or willing. When we allow our bodies and souls to flow more willingly they can better bend with the switchbacks and climbs that await us around the corner.

    As we transition to the next season, shake off the frost and warm up what is coming your way.

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  • The Quick Christmas

    Typically for me Christmas planning starts in late July. I line up Christmas lists, I start looking at dates for events during the winter season and I am prepped with tinsel and ornament grenades.

    But this year is going to look a little bit different. Because we’re moving mid-December, much to my dismay, that means no early decorating. 100% of my energy is going to be going towards the move. While I am absolutely okay with this, a small part of me is sad that I won’t get to enjoy the fullness of the Christmas holiday. While holding both of those things together, I am ready to charge the Christmas season with all the jingle bells, glistening lights, and cheesy Hallmark movies I possible can manage.

    I’ve put together 3 mindset opportunities that I think are critical to managing a quick Christmas season.

    #1 Keep the favorites, ditch the rest.

     

    What are your core Christmas-y things? Is it the tree? The Lights? The stockings? The nativity or nutcrackers? Is it the food or beautifully wrapped presents? No matter what your favorite Christmas decorations are, pick 2 or 3 to maintain your focus on when you have only 10 days to decorate (like me.) Christmas trees and lights are the 2 things that sing glorious songs in my heart, everything else is the harmony. So as we prepare to move, the tree and the lights are most likely going up day 1. Definitely week 1.

    #2 Keep up the routine

    Atmosphere is really important. The environment is key! But adjusting my expectations of how decked the halls can be in my new home is step 1 for me. Step number 2 is keeping up with all the fun plans that we typically do every year to re-emphasize the Christmas spirit! This means going to the Nutcracker at the Arizona Ballet, walking the paths of Desert Botanical Gardens, driving around to see the light shows on Comstock and even more. While I don’t plan on packing in every day to have something going on, I am keeping the staples true to the season. So even though there are boxes to unpack and walls to decorate, I can still enjoy the Christmas season.

    #3 Keep the reason at the forefront

    I am one to get wrapped up in the glitter and glitz of the holidays. But at the core of it, we need to remember the “why”. It’s important to return here so even though we can enjoy the commercialism of the season, it doesn’t supersede the actual point of Christmas. The birth of our savior, Jesus Christ, is the reason why Christmas seems like such a party. It is literally a month of a giant birthday party! We should thoroughly enjoy and turn our eyes to what get to celebrate this season for.

    Even though there might not be a fully decked out tree or my army of nutcrackers completely set up, we get to celebrate the birth of Jesus and the fulfillment of the prophetic words that led to the undeserving grace that is available to us all.

    “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6

  • Managing the chaos of family at Christmas

    Depending on what your family looks like, the holidays could be a special and sacred time or they could pose lots of chaos and anxiety. And if you are married and split time between the in-laws and your own family, it could be really crazy. Not to mention travel, kids, other plans, and friends!

    All of these things are near guaranteed to create an atmosphere of chaos for a season that be filled with joy! Here are my 3 top tips to managing chaos during Christmas

    #1 Establish clear and concise boundaries

    When you are able to communicate your needs and boundaries clearly and effectively to your family, they can better manage their expectations when it comes to what they will be experiencing. I highly recommend that you do this before the holidays roll in. Do this some time in October or early November. Or if plans are being hashed out in July— do it then! What happens when you tell your mom or mother-in-law the day before Thanksgiving that you’ll only be able to be there for the early afternoon, is that she spent time planning, shopping, cooking, and it’s out of respect that you notify them early. 

    You’re asking them to respect your boundaries, so that respect needs to be extended to them as you make your boundaries. When you make these boundaries, you might experience some push back. You might encounter resistance. When it comes to family, that can be difficult. But stay grounded in the fact that you’re making the best decisions for you and your kids (if applicable).

    #2 Make a routine

    Is every other year spent at your families and the years in-between at your in-laws? How about Easter at your families and Thanksgiving at your in-laws? It is possible to split up the designations for each holiday to make the expectations really clear. Not only does a routine help support you and your process of deciding where to go each holiday, but this routine can also be good for your kids! 

    When you establish a clear routine and schedule with your family they can know what to expect every time. Make sure to check in with them every few years or so to make sure that this routine is good for them. If it’s not, have an honest conversation about how you can adjust.

    #3 Have them come to you

    Do you find yourself spending hours on a plane or car ride to go see family during the holidays? Not only does that sound like a great recipe for grumpy kids but it is wasting away precious hours gathered around the hearth of your home around really sacred and special times. If you do elect to stay home for the holidays and omit the traveling craziness, invite your family to come to your home! 

    This doesn’t mean that you have to put on some elaborate spread. But it invites them into your home and extends a warm invitation to join in the holiday festivities. It can be a simple note of, “we’re staying at home this year for the holidays, but you are more than welcome to join us as we celebrate.” I would advise to go back to tip #1 when doing this and make sure you give good notice. Remember, respect is key in all of this.

    All in all, remember that this isn’t about perfection. This is about consistency, respect and clarity. A little bit of work or some hard(er) conversations at the beginning can override any confusions and disrespect that might come along with the tips above (if done incorrectly). Remember the reason for each season. That family being together is important, with your sanity running at the #2 slot of priorities.

  • Make More Christmas Memories With These Ideas

    Together time is what makes the holiday season so special. If you’re just getting started in making your traditions your own, or you want to start some new memory making activities, you’ve come to the right place.

    #1 Enjoy an advent devotional

    One of the things I’ve come to really enjoy as I’ve gotten older is returning to the core of the season. There’s the glitz and glamour, and trust me— I’m all about that. But I am all about Jesus more. Having an advent devotional in your hands during the Christmas season is one of the ways you can turn back to your core. 

    Remember what we celebrate during this season and WHY we celebrate it. Why it is bittersweet that we have a massive worldwide birthday party for Jesus that we know is going to end up on the cross? Because the story of Jesus is not just a story. It is Truth. And It doesn’t begin with joy and end in sadness. The sadness of the reality of the cross is only the middle of the book. There is so much more on the other side of the cross. So while it begins with joy, it also ends there too. Opening a devotional every Christmas, helps prepare your heart for this. Check out my list of my favorite Advent Devotionals here.

    #2 Go Christmas light hunting

    Whether you make a game or scavenger hunt with it, or just drive around to local neighborhoods, Christmas lights are a fun way to bring in the holiday. As a kid, we used to pack up the car with blankets, a thermos full of hot chocolate and find all of our favorite spots in hopes of discovering some new ones on the way. Locally we have a map of all the great Christmas light displays all throughout the valley. That’s a great place to start. Or ask your neighbors of places they recommend— or better yet, go with them!

    #3 Christmas movie marathon

    This one might seem like a given, BUT there are certain suggestions that I highly recommend that you take into consideration. First, pull out all the stops. Hot Chocolate, Christmas cookies, maybe some ginger ale to combat the sugar stomach ache that might happen. Butter up some popcorn and hit play. Fun side note about the popcorn, out here in Arizona, some of the movie theaters actually sell massive bags of their popcorn. 

    Call your local Harkins or AMC to see if they do this and take some of the work and mess off of you. The other thing I suggest is to remain 100% present. Have you ever flipped on a movie to only open your phone and by the time you look up, you realize the movie is half over. While I’m not anti-phone, I am PRO-present. Be present with your friends and family that you have during this season. Put everyone’s phone in a bag or basket while the movies are playing for some quality bonding and togetherness.

    #4 Christmas tree decorating party

    I am always game for a party and this is one that I’ve wanted to do myself, but have never really had the time to. Remember the “old days” where you would see women in beautiful dresses and men in suits, toasting around the Christmas tree with eggnog or mulled wine? They would delicately place the fragile ornaments on the tree limbs as there was music and Yuletide festivity everywhere. 

    While our lives my not look as perfect as a Currier and Ives scenery, we can still pull together and focus ourselves on being present. Gathering the family one night where there is no sports, practices, or rehearsals. Where the phones get put away and the email notifications are silenced. The family can gather around the twinkle lights, have tinsel fights and maybe make a bit of a mess. But what is family without a little bit of mess.

    No matter what your season looks like, taking time to be together and remembering that Jesus is the center of it all is the core of why we do it all.

  • How to develop traditions for a lifetime of joyous seasons

    As we enter adulthood, we find ourselves at a crossroad. We can either carry with us the traditions and practices of the family we came from, or we can refocus and recenter our ideas and beliefs towards what we want in this world and out of life. But there is a third option that I want to encourage you in.

    Traditions are like a warm hug

    Traditions should be like a warm hug. They should be filled with joy and nostalgia. What traditions from your childhood feel like that to you? As you think through that, you can write them down or put them somewhere you’ll remember. Not all traditions have to be continued. Not all of them have to be stopped. I really do want to encourage you that there are no rules when it comes to tradition. 

    Guess what, some years, it’s just not going to happen. And that is 100% okay. There will be growing pains too. There will be things that you find will no longer suit you in the life stage you’re in. And there are times where it doesn’t feel tangible or possible to practice that tradition.

    When I first got married, my husband and I both struggled with reestablishing the traditions that we carried from our childhood and creating new ones. Ultimately, we were able to identify what was truly important for this or that tradition. And then we narrowed it down to what we can keep up with and what marks a significant moment. For example, every Christmas Eve he reads me the Polar Express. Silly, I know. But the first year we were dating, we were apart for Christmas and he called me and read that story to me. Every year, when we pull out the book, it is just a sweet reminder of that moment when we first started dating and would do these little things to hold each other dearly.

    Whatever route you decide, remember that you can make the rules. There is no tradition overlord that is going to come down and smite you for not doing one ritual or another. Tradition is there so we can remember, recall, and enjoy the pieces that we love and hold dearly.

    In Rememberance...

    Whether you identify it or not, the Bible is FILLED with tradition setting and execution. When Jesus was at the last supper, he instructed all of his followers to “do this in remembrance of me.” And to this day, you’re hard pressed to find Christian church that doesn’t practice communion. Our faith traditions are just as important our our familial traditions. But please remember that traditions are about the heart of things. Not just repetition for the sake of it.

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