Browsing Tag

called

  • 9 to 5 Faith Podcast: Episode 10

    This is a transcript from episode 10 of the 9 to 5 Faith Podcast with Paige C. Clark.

    Share on Social

    Start of Podcast

    Paige C. Clark 0:36
    It’s Paige C. Clark, and you’re listening to the nine to five faith podcast. Hi, everyone. I’m so excited to have you today. And I’m even more excited to have my friend Cami on with me. How’s it going Cami?

    Cami Aufdermauer 0:49
    So good. How are you?

    Paige C. Clark 0:51
    Good. It’s also a podcast like so like waving might not be like we are videoing it as well. It’ll be on YouTube. So if you want to see Cami wave, just go over to the YouTube. How are you doing today?

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:07
    I’m so good. It’s just good to meet you and get to chat with you. So I’m excited.

    Paige C. Clark 1:11
    Yes, me too. So tell me a little bit about you and what you do. And I call this like the why I should care kind of thing whenever I do presentations. I said like, this is me now. Why should you care that I’m talking to you. So I

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:27
    love Well, cuz I’m awesome.

    Paige C. Clark 1:28
    No, are awesome.

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:32
    Well, my name is Cami. It’s and my last name is Aufdermauer. So it’s super hard to spell. There’s actually a song that can help. But we won’t go over that right now. I am a mom, I am a wife. I have two teenage daughters. So really right there. You should, you should want to hear what I have to say. Because I’m surviving. Let’s just say, I’m not just surviving parenting teenagers. I feel like I’m thriving in it. But they are 12 and 13. So check on me in two years. Yeah. But I, you know, I have lived I live in Oregon. So if you’ve ever heard of Tilamook cheese, I live until a mug which is the cheese capital of, well, I think the world but maybe Oregon. And my family has lived until a mug for over 100 years. So I was as born and raised in this community as you get. And I have just, I’ve grown up really loving my roots here. And yeah, I just I love I love I love getting to raise my girls here in this town too.

    Paige C. Clark 2:38
    That’s awesome. And 100 years, that’s crazy. And I think we’re gonna have some really angry Wisconsin errs listening. Don’t care, I won’t tell them that I have Tillamook cheese in my fridge right now. Thank you, there we go. We want to tell them I really do. So tell us a little bit about like your nine to five and what that looks like for you.

    Cami Aufdermauer 3:02
    Oh, man, well, I have to back up six months, because my nine to five now based on on six months ago is totally different. So for seven and a half years, my nine to five was that I was the executive director of Habitat for Humanity. So I’m sure you’ve heard of habitat most people have. So I ran that organization and our community and truly felt like that was the job for me. Like I was like, This is what God created me for, you know, really enjoyed the work we got to do with family isn’t just everything that I got to do in running in that organization. So that you know, that was your typical nine to five in the office every day even through COVID we had I think like three weeks where I worked from home. Other than that in the office, you know, balancing the life and what that looks like. Well, my town so I only had to drive a couple of minutes to work right? But really got pretty radically rocked. When I read a book called Dream I dare you about probably about seven months ago, I read this book, and it really opened my eyes to okay, like I I put myself in this position to really think that this particular nine to five is my forever. Like I’m like, Why would I go anywhere else I’m it’s a Christian organization, I get to do good work for people. You know, this, if I’m going to work anywhere in this community. I don’t see any other job in this community that I would want. And so I started reading this book and God just really started to stir my heart for bigger dreams like outside of my community outside of what I was doing in just Silla monk. And he really started to be like, No, I there’s something more here. And so I was like, Okay, but what is that? What does that even look like? And so, what happened is I got really curious because again, I’m reading this book that’s really rad. Literally like opening my heart. And I’m like, Alright, who is this author? Like, who’s this Julia Gentry? What is this all about? And so I did you know, like in a good researcher, I went and found her on social media and stalked her Facebook page, you know. And so I’m following along, and I’m looking in her feed, and I found out that she was hiring for a super part time, Director of Operations, like 20 hours a week, nothing I can leave my job for, like the salary was not there, all of that. But I was like, I’m supposed to be involved, even if at that point, it meant just being a volunteer, whatever, that look alike, right. And so I reached out to her, and I said, I think I’m supposed to be a part of what you’re doing your books, rockin my world. And long story short, I ended up after a lot of prayer, and a lot of, you know, talks with my husband. I ended up quitting my my nine to five as the executive director, and launching into full time work ministry as the director of operations for Julia Gentry, who wrote the book dream, I dare you. I mean, my family thought I was a little crazy. But it’s so far. So I’ve been working for him now for six months. And it has been completely different for me, because this is my first job ever. Where I work from home. I mean, I didn’t even know that was possible. Like, I know people do that. But I know it was possible for me. Yeah. And that’s been such a such a, such a drastic difference from being in an office.

    Paige C. Clark 6:40
    Yeah, yeah. And how accessible it now is. So cool, because I think before it was, like, only certain special jobs, and certain titles got like the privilege of doing work from home. And now I feel like it’s more like widely kind of applied to the workforce. Right. So that’s awesome. That’s a really killer story.

    Cami Aufdermauer 7:04
    And it’s my favorite,

    Paige C. Clark 7:05
    I’ll have to tell you a story later of some crazy thing that I, you know, crazy opportunities really happened. Just like just like that. So that’s awesome. And and so take me through a little bit of like, what your day looks like from not only from like, a work perspective, but also like, you’re working from home. Now you don’t have to commute but also like you’re not in an office, which makes wearing sweatpants really easy to to what your time with God looks like.

    Cami Aufdermauer 7:39
    I am so glad you’re asking me this now. Because I feel like even last week, it looks so different, like this week, this week, I’m really proud of what it looks like. So maybe, maybe I was just getting prepared for this podcast. But I think what I love and I say this to my kids all the time, as I’m getting ready to walk, I have a little cottage in my backyard. That is my office. So thankfully, there is a little bit of separation from my house. But I always say, all right headed to work. It’s a long commute. So I have fully again, I said I have teenagers. And so we’ve actually because I do believe that I want to be focused when I’m in my office, I’m working on work all those things. So we’ve actually created a color code system for my door. So they know when mom’s little sign is red, you know, unless you’re bleeding or the house is burning down, like don’t come in. So we have different layers of those colors.

    Paige C. Clark 8:32
    No, that’s a really good thing.

    Cami Aufdermauer 8:35
    Yeah, they know if it’s yellow, it’s like, okay, come on, and say hi, but then head on out. If it’s purple. Come on in. It’s a party. Yeah, no, I’m gonna be honest, it’s never purple. But if it were, they would be excited. Yeah. And so I I get out my cottage, I believe very much in creating a workspace that you love aesthetically. So like, you could see, you know, that’s just everything’s very mean like it when you walk into my office, you can feel me there. Like I got a dream on my wall. I’ve got this beautiful lie in here. Because I really want when I walk into my office, I want it to be a place that I enjoy. I also really like a clean space. So that’s important for me, always making sure there’s no piles, making sure things are clean. And then my day starts out here. Thankfully, I get to create my own schedule. Yeah, but I start every single day at 5am. And that’s because I want my morning time. I want my morning time. And so what I’ve done and what my schedule literally looks like right now is I get up at five. Again, this was not last week. So let’s just say it’s been two days, but I get up at five and from five to six my dog and I go for a walk. That way he gets out I get fresh air. I listen to a podcast because I really love personal development. And so I always put in a podcast that’s something that I’m working towards growing in right now I’m helping create a speaker business for Juliet. So I’m listening to all these podcasts about how to create a speaker business. And then from six to seven, I have it on my calendar, like, actually in my phone, but that’s my Jesus time. And so, again, today’s CIO will check on me a couple months to make sure it’s sustainable. But I do believe and calendaring things, and making sure that, hey, if I’m gonna put, I’m gonna put this podcast in my calendar and show up, I’d better be showing up for my Jesus time in the calendar. Yeah. And so my day doesn’t start until after that time, but what I’ve also pre I’m trying to create margin. And so from that seven to eight, that is actually my planning time. So that is me sitting down with my, you know, I’ve got my planners and like my things, that is me sitting down and going, what do I want to accomplish in this day? Because I found that when I do that, I get so much more clear and excited and focused on what it is that I’m doing. And I feel like I have a purpose in my day, rather than just like, Okay, what’s on, you know, what’s on my agenda? What meetings Am I a part of, because meetings are one thing? It’s what fill up all of the things between the meetings that are really where I want to be intentional about my time. Yeah, and that is what a typical day looks like for me this week.

    Paige C. Clark 11:30
    And hopefully, weeks in the future, or weeks

    Cami Aufdermauer 11:33
    in the future. I think that one of the things too, like my Jesus time, right. Yeah, I will be honest, that before this week that Jesus time was lacking. Yeah. And I, there’s a lot of reasons why, but I think it’s because, man, I’ve shared a little bit about like my transition, I’ve been this new job for the last six months. I am so fulfilled in my job. I mean, I know not everybody can say that. But I can, like, I feel like I truly am exactly where God has called me to be. And like, I am so fulfilled, which is great. And that can be a dangerous place to be because I’m so fulfilled in my work, that I actually don’t sometimes feel like I need God to fill me up. Because I’m just so like, like, loving where I am. Yeah. So that has been something that I didn’t really notice that, you know, it actually took, I watched some people around me kind of start to burn out. And it more came from a place of I don’t feel burned out. I don’t want to get there. Right, I want to make sure that I’m doing the things that create a life of margin, so that I am having places to rest. Yes, I can love what I do. But if I’m not going to the sustainer to be sustained, like it’s not sustainable. And so I’m really trying to create, like I want margin in my life, because I believe that God’s revelation is going to come in that margin. And when I put him first like, he’s going to redeem, I mean, even the hour that I’m giving him dedicated time in the day, he’s going to redeem that tenfold by direct revelation. One of the things is that I don’t want to circle the same mountain. I don’t want to keep walking around the same mountain trying to figure out these lessons, right. Like, I don’t want God to speak to my heart. He’s not if I’m not listening, it’s gonna be really hard to hear him.

    Paige C. Clark 13:30
    Yeah. Yeah. And also like, couple things there. One, I am with you on having a clean space if my office is not clean. It’s a little crazy. Now this might seem like a real like nitpicky kind of question, but for the work from homers, they might understand this. Do you do your Jesus time in your office or in your home?

    Cami Aufdermauer 13:55
    That is a really good question. I’d be curious what other people say so I do it in my office. Okay. Yeah, and I could do it in my home. But again, when I do my Jesus time, like everybody’s still sleeping like they’re still out there. For a while, I thought I would have to separate them. And if I didn’t have good boundaries, I might have to Yeah, because I can very easily get excited to get on the day. The one thing I’ve done I will not have my phone next to me during my Jesus time. So I’ll put it on airplane mode. I take my smart my my Apple watch off. Yeah, I don’t want any alerts during the hour. My I don’t know if you know the Enneagram but I’m a seven on the Enneagram dude. Yeah, so I can get very distracted. Yeah, so I have to take off all the distractions and really just be present in that moment. Because work, the excitement of what’s the what’s to work on will catch me and I it’s hard to rein it back in. Yeah,

    Paige C. Clark 14:57
    for sure. I call it the shiny object syndrome

    Cami Aufdermauer 14:59
    or just So are you are you a seven? Two, I’m

    Paige C. Clark 15:01
    a six wing seven. So. But yeah, that it’s funny because I think that, like, back back before COVID, and work from home became like really more broad scale, I feel like that these conversations that I’m having with you and having on the podcast would look completely different than they look now. Because that margin that we have to have when we work from home, like we need boundaries, even in our own home, because we’re always working from there. So for example, my husband, he works for himself, he’s always worked from home, he always has a dedicated office space. But when we first got married, we, we found his work kind of bleeding out into our relationship and our regular life and everything like that. And it was just like, Okay, we need to create a physical boundary. So like, when you’re not working, the office doors are shut. And I’ve had to do kind of the same thing, which is why I was asking of like, in my office, I work in my office, anything else, especially like, my Jesus time, or even my writing as part of my work? I can’t even write in my office. It’s too distracting. I have to go away to do.

    Cami Aufdermauer 16:32
    Yeah, yeah, I think that’s good to just kind of know what works for people or what doesn’t. And I think, I mean, he kind of, I had a little conviction come up, because I would not say that lately. Until this week, I have been very good at having those boundaries. Like when I leave there, because I was just thinking my daughter, she, I was texting on my phone. And she goes, Mom, you don’t always need to message Julia, which is my boss. She’s like, you don’t always need to be on the phone with Julia, because I am on the phone with my boss a lot. We do text a lot. We’re always communication. And thankfully, that time I actually wasn’t talking to Julia. So I was like, well, actually, I’m not talking to her. But it did make me kind of go, oh, you know, like, I gotta make sure that that I, I mean, how often are we calendaring time with our kids or our husband? So like, I think just, and I even made that intention. This week, I told my boss, which she’s used to me working. I mean, I’m in the bathtub editing videos. I’m right. And I can you know, it doesn’t matter. Because I love it so much. I’m always doing it now. And it’s easy to do it. It’s easy, easy, it is hard to not right. It’s a meaning

    Paige C. Clark 17:42
    not that the work is easy, but it is easy, because you like it and it is not burdensome to do well.

    Cami Aufdermauer 17:49
    Exactly. And so the hard thing is stopping. Because it’s again, so fulfilling. So like, where do I want my fulfillment to come from? And will I look back and think even though I’m having fun, and all these great things, will I look back and have missed out on time with my family? You know? Yeah, I just don’t I just believe it’s important for me to always evaluate where I’m where I’m getting my fulfillment from?

    Paige C. Clark 18:17
    Yeah, yeah, for sure. Gosh, there’s so many things, so many different, like, Bunny trails, I want to go down right now. Because you’re saying so many good things, but one of them is, is the reality of being able to work remote means we can’t, we can work from anywhere at any time. And that is not, it is both freeing and binding. Because churro because, like so I work in social media, social media is always happening. Right? Like things when things pop off in the world. They happen on social media, like just saying. And so for me, it’s really easy to justify kind of always being on and always logging on. So like, besides, you know, just being recently convicted of that, or do you have any ways that you try to create better margin around that of like your emails or you know, you talked about Trello, your Trello board?

    Cami Aufdermauer 19:31
    Challenge changed my life. Are we going there? Let me answer your question. Yeah, there’s a whole nother thing.

    Paige C. Clark 19:36
    Oh, that because

    Cami Aufdermauer 19:40
    my husband is so tired of hearing me talk about Trello I’m like, is there a support group for people because I just want to talk to people about Trello

    Paige C. Clark 19:47
    Trello if you’re listening, looking for sponsorships

    Cami Aufdermauer 19:53
    go for real. So I think I mean, if we just go that route, I think one of the things I know What about myself, is that in order for me to thrive, and again, you look at your Enneagram, like, I’m an Enneagram, seven, so can get super distracted, rabbit trails, all those kinds of things. Yeah, so I have to have systems and processes in my life, like I have to, not only do I enjoy them, I enjoy setting up systems, I enjoy running systems I enjoy, I love efficiency. And so I, when I got into this job, again, I come from a company where I’ve created the entire company, you know, like, I create the atmosphere, where I came in to now I have one boss, and I’m the only employee, and she’s been an entrepreneur for years. And so I came in, and I’ll never forget what I said to her, I said, so I’m going to need three days to set us up a system, and I’m going to use Trello, which is an organizational system to basically Task Manager days with your team, right, and she’s like, you’re gonna need how many days to do what, and we always laugh about it. Because what I didn’t know, coming into this job until I was in it was how much I needed structure. And so when I went the first week in the job, and every meeting I’d have with her, I’d come out of the meeting with five pages of notes, none of which were organized, all the action items were mixed in this, this notebook somewhere, I thought I was gonna die. Like I’m just like, I cannot function in this world. And so I had to create those systems for our company. And now we use them every single day, like my Trello board, runs my day. And I’ve been able to bring our other team members now into that world. And now what’s so much more productive, I believe, when you set up systems and processes, it gets you to the place where you create the margin. Yes, the person who showed me how to use Trello, he says, yes, it’s gonna take you time to set this up. But the amount of time that you’re gonna save on the back end is tenfold. And I believe that I’ve seen it in my own life. So by having these kinds of structures and processes in place, it allows me to kind of create space and areas where, you know, areas that I need to create space in.

    Paige C. Clark 22:16
    Yeah. And I think like, I think that some people might feel ashamed that they’re not able to manage certain, I guess I call them temptations, but like checking your email first thing in the morning, or like, you know, scrolling through your Slack messages in the night, or whatever it is, I call them temptations, because they’re taking me, for me, that’s what they are. As, like, people might feel shame around that as a sign of lack of willpower. But really, it is just adding the systems in our life to better be efficient at the things that we really want to be efficient at. Do I really want. Do I need to be efficient at managing my email? No. Like, I don’t, it’s not my, my work email. It’s my personal email. It’s fine. It can hang out. Okay, if I have 20 emails from Wayfair? Let’s see. All right. That doesn’t really matter at the end of the day. But I think there are some people might feel like a lot of shame and in kind of admitting to that but like adding adding timers on to your apps. If you have an iPhone or you an Android or iPhone user,

    Cami Aufdermauer 23:37
    oh, iPhone, and I use it I use all the time. Like if I know I have even a meeting coming up. I always I set my timers all day long. That way, I don’t have to think about those things. The number one thing I can say helps with what you’re just saying for me is my phone does not live in my bedroom at night. Yeah. And it hasn’t for probably a year and that’s been the greatest smallest. I mean, that’s a very small sacrifice. I still have Alexa. So I haven’t alarm you. Oh, Alexa is talking to me now. But But I definitely like that has been a huge game changer for me, because now I’m not distracted. I think sleep is important because I got a lot to do in the day. I want to have energy. And if I’m on there scrolling I will also say remember how this week has been like a good week for me. I will say that I a couple of days ago. I took Facebook because I don’t use other social media. It’s mostly Facebook. I took Facebook off my phone. Yes, I can still get on it on my computer if I want because I’m not going to sit there and scroll. Yeah, that has been pan that’s been free and sometimes to just take that space and say, but I never felt like I could do that. Like in my jobs. I’m like, but I need it for my job. And not you I know you feel me girl. Yeah, like doesn’t need to be on our phone. Could it just be on the Computer. I think those small tweaks have allowed me to say, Okay. And a lot of the time, we’re just bored. So like, if we’re Oh, yeah, you know, like I’m eating because I’m bored. I’m, you know, scrolling Facebook, because I’m bored. It’s a lot of the time, we’re just not, like, we’re just bored. So then really asking myself like, Okay, I’m bored. What else could I do here? To make it so that it’s not just productive? But filling? Yeah, we know those things. Don’t fill us. Like foods not gonna fill me Facebook, social media is not going to fill me. Okay, so what what is it that would fill me with the Lord? getting some fresh air outside? You know, doing something creative? I think we need to get back to creating

    Paige C. Clark 25:47
    math? Oh, gosh, yes, for sure. And what I was saying about the timers, I don’t know if you do this, but on each app, you can set a time limit. So like, if you’re like, I only want to spend 30 minutes a day on any of my social apps, you can set it and it’ll like shut down the app. Like, it’ll ask you to like, Are you sure you want to like when Netflix judges you? And it was like, are you still watching your apps? We’ll be like, Are you sure you want to? And you can do that. And here’s like a fun. I mean, it’s fun for me and my organizational brain. But if you want to how many times like have you opened your phone, just kind of like on autopilot and just like clicked on your social media apps? And like, you’re just like, oh, like, how did I get it? I get in here, right? One thing to do to combat that, that that I really love, is to move your apps around. Whoa, because if you move your apps, if you change where they’re at, you have to actively go looking for them. And it brings together mindfulness because like, you’ll like swipe and like click where your Facebook was, and you’re like, Wait, why am I on the CVS app? Like or like, I don’t want to, like work out why am I in my health app? Like,

    Cami Aufdermauer 27:14
    that’s where you like strategically put the vital app?

    Paige C. Clark 27:17
    Exactly. Anytime I click on this, just open the pipe. There you go. So there’s I mean, there’s definitely things that we can do to like help kind of create that margin. And I will say to, for anyone who’s listening, my my sage advice, I guess, is to set the expectations kind of upfront with your work. If your work is requiring you to use your personal cell phone, negotiate, you know, a cell phone stipend, and if that’s not part of it, then say like, I’m sorry, I will not have email on my phone, I will not have slack on my phone, like, I will not be available, you can call me. But I am not going to have any of these communication things because that’s your own boundary for your own life and your own well being and give an inch, take a mile kind of situation of like, Oh, if it’s just one slack that I’m answering on the weekend, they’re gonna, you’re gonna still get them.

    Cami Aufdermauer 28:18
    And it’s funny because I was I did take my phone in bed last night, not for like the whole night. But just because I was like, oh, I want to do this. And so like I was laying there and doing this, because I specifically told my boss, I’m like, Okay, go like I have yet to get your intentions out there. And I just said, Alright, I’m done with work for like, don’t let me keep working. You know, yeah, to cut this off, because I love it. I love working. And I checked my email, and I responded to an email to her at like, nine 930. And then I emailed her right back, I said, No, I’m not answering emails in my bed at 930. You know, we kind of wouldn’t have to joke with ourselves and be like, but it was so automatic. Yeah, when that email and like, respond, like, what? No, I can’t just wait to respond. What would that mean about me? But those are the questions I have to ask myself like, where am I going? Because I know that I’m in this for the long haul. Like I want to be in ministry doing what I’m doing for years to come. And if I can create healthy boundaries, hate that word, but if I can create helping, what would be another word, healthy habits and rhymes like that? Sounds good. But I can create healthy habits now. I believe that will make this more it is it’s going to make it sustainable for the long haul.

    Paige C. Clark 29:39
    Yeah, yeah, for sure. And like, I think what we undervalue as as Christians, I guess, is the ability to create habit and routine. Like it changes our brain chemistry. There’s a reason why I go to on my phone and I open Facebook every time and there’s a reason why you know you want on when you’re like, bored, you like go to food because it’s like, like on some chemical level, I don’t want to lessen the people who have serious addictions. But the chemical response in our brain is very similar and in smaller amounts to that that has, you know, dopamine, or I want to say serotonin, but that’s what puts you to sleep, but your dopamine and all your other hormones that go on in your brain, that stuff gets released when we see a notification pop up or something. But that can be reverse engineered for our faith. Totally. Totally, yeah.

    Cami Aufdermauer 30:41
    Can we get that app, like, let that happen, you know, true, though. It’s true. And just small changes, like when I say like, when I say my week has totally changed this week. These are not big changes, right? It’s just being more intentional. And I mean, like, this is not a sales pitch. But when I say this book dream, I dare you by Julian Kendrick, remember, that was a little sales pitch. When I say it, this book changed my life. It changed my life. Because not only did it give me a dream, bigger to live for, but it helps me really know how to take captive, my thoughts, and to retrain my brain, which is exactly what you’re saying. Yeah. Because I now know what beliefs like what limiting beliefs have kept me from moving forward in my life. And I now have a conviction that is super strong to put my whole life on, like, and so like, even today, when I was struggling through and like, I was noticing some big feelings. And I’m able to say, like, am I living chosen today, because that’s my conviction that I live a life where I am chosen. And if I know that to be true, I no longer need the world to tell me I’m chosen. I literally live from a place of being chosen. Yeah, there’s so much depth there. And that’s really what her books about is finding that conviction that you can say, at any point, like, am I living chosen? And if the answer is no, that’s always when it’s going to show up for me in, you know, it’s always when my fruit is not the fruit of the Spirit. I mean, that’s, that’s really what it is. Anytime I’m living outside of, like really seeing the fruit. It’s because I’m not living in my conviction. And I just have to check myself.

    Paige C. Clark 32:25
    Yeah, yeah. And like, also, when we are operating in kind of this autopilot, kind of state, I’m actually my own personal plug, I’m writing a book about this. And one of the chapters is on autopilot. And it’s when we’re operating in this kind of just like, I guess, stress response, where we’re just kind of going through the motions, like, where’s the room for the Holy Spirit in that? Right? Because the Holy Spirit, like, like, I think there’s very like, I think, within the Trinity, they all have very different personalities. And I think like, the Holy Spirit is one of like, spontaneity, right? We see him move, like in the moment. And and if, if we’re kind of stuck in this autopilot mode, like how do we respond to the Holy Spirit when he asks us to?

    Cami Aufdermauer 33:17
    I just have this vision. I know I mentioned the INIA Graham a couple of times, because it has been so helpful for me in my life.

    I literally just when you were talking about the Holy Spirit, I was I have that Holy Spirit’s of seven.

    Like I was like, and then I’m like, What would God the Father, what would you? Like? I was like, how fun would that be? To dig a little into that? I think they’re probably every number, obviously. But like, I really got my brain thinking.

    Paige C. Clark 33:46
    That’s really fun. Like, what Myers Briggs is the Trinity.

    Cami Aufdermauer 33:51
    Somebody needs to write that book.

    Paige C. Clark 33:55
    And Mark is struck by lightning. I know.

    Cami Aufdermauer 34:01
    They really, like, you’re gonna have to put the Enneagram test link like, oh, yeah, because it really is been so helpful for me. Yeah. And just understanding the why I do things like the man it’s been, and then I can count that. I mean, that’s, that is why again, we talked about systems and processes. Those literally keep me being able to function because I need them in my life. Anytime I meet another fellow seven, and I’m like, Do you have a Trello board? Do you have systems on there? Like, I don’t have any of that. I’m like, let me teach you. Because I’m telling you like, once you learn how to create systems and structure and processes, not to become this rigid person, but to be able to have it so that it can give you that margin. Yeah, changes. It changes the game. I don’t want to hold anything up here in my head. I want to have it so that it’s out somewhere and then when I’m off, you know, doing my things paddleboarding. riding my motorcycle like adventuring? You know, I don’t want to have to think about Monday and what I have to be doing, I shouldn’t have to, there should be a system set up so that the things that I’m working on are already there. And they’re just waiting for

    Paige C. Clark 35:14
    me. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Gosh, if funny, like little tangent about the Enneagram. I love it only and most mostly because it is, it has felt the most true to me. I’ve done a lot of like the Myers Briggs Strengths Finder. And I think they all have their place and all kind of do their own thing. What I like about Enneagram is it felt most accurate of like, okay, this is the root of how I’m acting out of this is my core fear. This is my core intention. And this is what I act out of. Funny side story, when I was in high school, senior year, they made us take a personality, like Job test, really long test, let me tell you like an hour long. And you got called out a class to go take it, and I went and took it. And then I like, got to the end of the test. And it was like, We’re sorry, your personality does not match anything in our databases. And I was like, okay, so then I just like went about my life. And then I come back. Well, then I get called back into the office. And they’re like, You need to take the test. Okay, I tried. I broke the test. I tried to take this test, and it didn’t work. They’re like, Nah, just take it again. Like, okay, like, sir. So I took it again, it got the same exact results. And I just remember feeling like being like, what does that say about me? Because all my friends were like, you know, it was so accurate. It was exactly what I want to do with my life. It was like 100%, just like right there. And I’m like, I wasn’t in their database.

    So all that to say, I’m glad Enneagram has a number for me.

    Cami Aufdermauer 37:19
    But so have you discovered like in that, have you discovered why yet like now?

    Paige C. Clark 37:25
    Like, I can’t even remember what tests it was. It was like, I remember like what the format of it was like, it gave you two options, like two paragraphs, and you had to select which one you related most with.

    Cami Aufdermauer 37:43
    Wow, that’s fast. That was it. And I

    Paige C. Clark 37:45
    just, and I’m like the, like getting it one time. It was like, Okay, getting it two times in a row. I was like, okay, like, I guess I really am weird multiple times over. Wow. Wow, that’s awesome. I will drop a link in the show notes to the Enneagram test. Because it’s, it’s insightful, and it’s really helpful. Okay, like, let’s get back to the topic.

    Cami Aufdermauer 38:16
    So it’s gonna be productivity slash Trello. Board and Enneagram. Yeah,

    Paige C. Clark 38:21
    I even wrote down the name of this episode as we were talking. So you know, it’s gonna be all good. Because I was like, Yeah, Trello Enneagram. All the good stuff. So tell me a little bit about what like your faith extracurriculars look like? So you wake up in the morning, you have your Jesus time all set aside, you have your boundaries. What else do you do what else goes on in the life of Cami?

    Cami Aufdermauer 38:52
    Wow, what a good question. So I am really involved in our church. We started going to a new new church to us about No, I think it’s been about three years now. And we have always been my husband and I have for the past 10 years have been in some type of leadership role in our church, whether that was, you know, on the worship team leading Bible Studies. And so when we came to our new church about three years ago, I remember just being like, I’m not going to do anything. I’m just gonna show up on a Sunday and I’m gonna, you know, do that. Well, that didn’t last long, because that’s not who God created me to be. Right. And I again, back to reading Julia’s book. While I was reading that it started to bring up I had remembered that there was a ministry called Embrace grace, which is a ministry for unmarried moms and teen unexpected pregnancies. Yeah. And I was like, while I was reading her book, I was like, Oh, I forgot about that. Like, I wanted to start a group because it’s a nonprofit, but then you start groups in your own church, right? And I remember Calling my pastor and being like, hey, so I think I figured out how I want to be involved, like, because my pastor is really good about bringing people into their calling. And so he had asked me like, how do you want to be involved? And I was like, Well, I don’t really know. Yeah, I’ve done the worship team thing I’ve done that this thing, you know, I don’t know how I want to be involved. So I remember when you know that that dream was kind of awakened to me again, I reached out to him. And I said, I think I’m supposed to start this group. And he was just like, Great, let’s do it. And so that was about a year ago. And we ended up launching in about a month after that a month after I talked to him, we launched the first ever in our community, embrace Grace groups specific to single and pregnant moms. And so that when you live in a rural community, and you don’t have a lot of resources, we don’t even have a pregnancy center, we don’t have, we don’t have a lot of resources that you find in bigger towns. So this has been a really important, a really important program. And what’s really exciting is now we’re you know, a couple years later, and we’ve been able to take girls through this group and host really amazing baby showers. And I actually have been able to hand off the baton to my co leader who called me this was a couple of weeks ago, she called me and she said, Cami, I think I’m ready to take over leadership, which when we first started, she’s like, please don’t ever make me lead. And I was like, That’s amazing, Andrea, because I My schedule is super busy in ministry just in my job, right. And so part of me was like, I was thinking in my head, oh, man, like, I don’t know, if I have the time that I need to give to this like, and when she reached out and said, I’m ready to leave. I knew it was time to let that go. And then what got really exciting for me is that I’m like, Okay, God, but where do you want me? And he really showed me, he goes, I want you to mentor, that CO leader. Her name is Andrea, I want you to mentor her into her leadership role. And I was I love the thought of in the church, helping mentor people in their leadership roles, whatever that looks like, right? Yeah, like really driving people towards their purpose, which is also what I get to do in my daily job. But I was like, what if I could do that to help the church grow, too. And so that’s been kind of a new thing for me. And I think I’m 37 I might be 38 I’m not sure. I’m one of those numbers. I think I’m 38. And I don’t know if I ever considered myself like, you know, and I didn’t realize that, like, I can’t mentor people. Now. It’s not like you have to be old, you know, but it’s always kind of think like, oh, the older ladies are like mentoring. So I’ve never, I think it’s the first time that I’ve gotten to the place. I’m like, wait, no, I can start mentoring people like, I can start pouring into people. But I don’t. For me, I’m not interested in just leaving a Bible study or you know, that kind of thing. Like I’m interested in creating different kind of opportunities. So for example, I love to adventure like I am an adventurer. It goes with my Enneagram seven we’re literally called the adventure. And so I kayak paddleboard motorcycle like I love all those things. And so I started a women’s Adventure Club in my community. And it started as a small group through my church. And so I get like women signed up and once a month we go and we adventure. We go we go hiking. We go kayaking, we we went skydiving. That was pretty fun. I got any ladies, Pam, that was amazing. Wow. Wow, this I know, good. Group. Totally. So this group has grown from, you know, I mean, one, it’s from like, 10. To now we have over 500 women. Again, rural community. This has been a year only a year 500 women who are in now it’s a Facebook group, because I’m like, I can’t manage this, like Planning Center stuff. So 500 500 women and our community club, and all I do it’s so low key. All I do is the few days before our once a month we do at the first Saturday of every month. I just put where we’re meeting, and everyone shows up. I mean, the most we’ve had is probably like 4040 Women 40 Women kayaking, like I found kayaks from all over the community. But about we’ll get anywhere from about 15 to 40 will come but that is every week I occur every month. I’m getting to meet new women. I start every group out with a prayer. Like I’d say prayer for safety, you know, have a prayer. And it’s really I say we are here to build community. We are here to get to know each other. We are here to be in God’s creation and we do a name game every time so we’re learning people’s names. And as easy as it is because it’s really not hard like I literally post something on Facebook and we all show up the amount of ladies that afterwards are like, thank you so much for doing this, like people are hungry for community. Yes, sometimes it really is just as easy as saying, What am I already doing that I can bring people along? And I it’s been, it’s been so cool.

    Paige C. Clark 45:18
    Yeah, that’s awesome. And one thing, one of the ministry leaders who I’ve been involved with in the past, he just said, he said, you always have to eat. So why not bring people along with you to eat? And so like to what you’re saying, you’re already going kayaking, you’re already going on hikes, are already going skydiving, maybe. Might as well bring people along with that and create that community.

    Cami Aufdermauer 45:47
    I love it. And I actually it’s funny that you brought up the food thing. I don’t enjoy having meals together. I mean, that might be really weird. But I would much rather be outside. Yeah, like experiencing like, an opportunity. Like, if, honestly, like, if I were to hang out with friends, I would rather us always be doing something. Like it’s harder for me. Like, if I have the choice between like sitting across the table from you at a coffee shop, or just being outside on a walk or whatever, I’m always gonna choose the outside. And it’s just, it’s cool to be able to kind of meet people in like a more low key. I remember when I was with Habitat, especially during like, COVID time. Yeah, I was like, Hey, let’s get like, we don’t need to be in the office. Let’s go jump on the kayaks. I had so many meetings with people just on the kayaks. And like, that is how I want to live life.

    Paige C. Clark 46:39
    Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And I think just like, I think there’s something to say too, about like, feel like our world and our culture is so highly curated. I think there’s something to be said to what comes easy, and what comes naturally. And just incorporating that into a wider audience and into more people and, and then bringing God along with it.

    Cami Aufdermauer 47:05
    Well, I started thinking, it’s funny, because this has just been two days ago, because I literally work from home now. Right? Like so my, my kitchen tables right there. I could very easily open up to, you know, once a week where on the lunch hour, you know, or like 12 to noon, like bring your sack lunch come over, let’s do some dream storming. Let’s just really make this time about, like, what are you passionate about? What are your goals? Like, where are you headed? What’s God really put in your life? Because I want? Do I want those conversations and friendships. But I’m like, how easy for me to just throw it up on Facebook, create an event, you know, does a small group, like it takes no effort from me? Except for to just say, Okay, I’ll show up. Yeah, I mean, even if it’s just me, it shows up. Yeah, I think I used to have a lot of fear around starting something and nobody showing up. And that was based on the limiting beliefs that I was living in. And now it’s really like, God, if this is your plan, it is going to work. I truly believe that if it’s God’s plan it like you were telling me before we started this, like, if it’s God’s plan, it will work. The timing may not be ours. But I believe if he’s created me to create community, then he’s going to bring that community to me.

    Paige C. Clark 48:24
    Yeah, for sure. And you’re convicting me right now. Because so I just moved into this new community. And there’s maybe 50 people in here already. Very, very small community. And not all the houses are filled yet. They’re still getting filled. And we have this like community space, where there’s fire pits, and like a gazebo and a water fountain. And it’s really nice. And I’ve wanted to do like a weekly, like, weekly get together and just like say, Hey, I’m going to be in the community space with a bottle of wine. Anyone want to join, bring your own glass like that, that kind of thing. That’s something that I’ve been wanting to do. And like you’re convicting me of like, Just do it.

    Cami Aufdermauer 49:12
    Right. And think how I mean, and that’s going to, maybe we both need to check in on each other with this because again, not hard. Yeah, you know, we put it on your calendar by the bottle of wine show up, and then let God do the rest. And I think that’s what I’ve loved about Adventure Club. It does not feel heavy at all. Like I look forward to and I leave every single week just going like oh man that was good. Like this is this is what it’s all about, like connecting with people. And I think just God is so good to open us up like to open us up to really have the opportunity to say yes, and when he tells us to move, that we are obedient in that Yeah. Okay, it sounds like wine clubs happen.

    Paige C. Clark 49:58
    If it weren’t storming out All right now I would say like let’s do it Friday, but we are currently storming. There were hurricane force winds in the mountains. So, you know, yeah, casual, actually out here. So in the Arizona in the desert, you have to be careful when it’s windy. I like hope I don’t deter people from like coming out here I’m talking like, like 22 Like, winds remember half that 80 miles an hour. Okay, like so what happens especially during the summer when we get more wind storms, there’s this thing called Valley fever. And like, you can get it from breathing in like the dirt from like, the dust storms. So you know,

    Cami Aufdermauer 50:44
    really weird,

    Paige C. Clark 50:46
    right? I’m just like, there’s it’s just like a spore that you inhale that gets but like it’s not in the city or anything. What happens is the winds come from so far out of the city, it’s in the desert. Like that’s where this like, fungus lives in the desert. And it blows in and then like you get, you can get valley fever. Although my husband’s lived here for 30 Something he’s never got it never got it. It’s like the Oregon

    Cami Aufdermauer 51:11
    Sasquatch. Like is it real is not real,

    Paige C. Clark 51:15
    is definitely real, like people get really sick from it. But I personally have not and neither has my husband. So I I am just aware of the fact that like, Hey, don’t necessarily go run around in a dust storm. It’s you know, it’s not really good for your lungs.

    Cami Aufdermauer 51:34
    I wouldn’t even know what that is like because I live in a place that rains you know, 365 inches a year so Wow, all right, no dust here.

    Paige C. Clark 51:45
    I seriously, I have not only do we have the air filters in the ceiling, but we have like mobile filters in every room because it gets so dusty even inside the house.

    Cami Aufdermauer 52:00
    Well, you know what it must be nice page to have sunshine. I mean, it’s been a long winter here on the Oregon coast. Let me just say, remember what I was saying. Like, sometimes you started thinking about moving on, like never make a moving decision at the end of winter in Oregon. Because you’re just so ready. The sun will come but when when is my passion.

    Paige C. Clark 52:23
    And also wherever you want to move. Go visit it at the worst time of year.

    Cami Aufdermauer 52:31
    Right now in Arizona when there’s dust storms.

    Paige C. Clark 52:34
    No now’s not even the worst time I was gonna say like we’re still like three months away from the worst time which is August, July and August but I laugh one of my one of my neighbors she’s from California. And I the first year which was last year she was here. We had a bad dust storm and she was texting me like Paige I walked outside and there is dust everywhere. I was like yes. Like, this is a dust storm like this is what happens. They usually blow over in a few minutes, like usually takes like 15 minutes and they’re over with and then you can just go about your day. She texts me back. He’s like, it’s like frontier weather. I was like, Oh, like that is like the best thing I have ever heard because I definitely have a tumbleweed and my friend Yeah, right now my gosh, the wind. tumbleweeds are real thing if you like don’t believe the movies. They actually exist guys.

    Cami Aufdermauer 53:36
    Oh, when I walked out of the airport elevators in Florida, because I’ve never been I literally the ladies I was with. I was like, What is that like talking about the humidity? Yeah. And they’re like, that’s humidity. I’m like, Oh, good, Lord. That is not cool.

    Paige C. Clark 53:52
    No, nope. It’s like opening an oven door. Just like weird. Yeah, I don’t do humidity, which is why I’m in the desert. i My family lives in the South. I will not follow them there. No. Oh, gosh, so many good things. One thing that I’d like to talk about and this kind of like, I don’t know, I was looking over these questions. And I was just like, I’m like really like pushing people to kind of like tattletale on themselves and like, be a little bit vulnerable. But what’s your biggest struggle when it comes to practicing your faith and working full time?

    Cami Aufdermauer 54:34
    Oh, well, I think we did kind of touched on a little little bit, but I think it’s not like honestly, this is what God’s showing me is not finding fulfillment and anything above him. Yeah. Because again, I get that I am blessed that my job is so stinking fulfilling like, truly. But I don’t I don’t want anything to fill me up. except for, you know, to overflowing like nothing’s gonna fill me to overflowing like God can and will. And so I think that for me, I just have to always check where I’m getting filled up. Yeah, it has to be it has to be God first. And just really making sure again, asking myself that question of if I continue on this, even though I’m having fun, will I have missed out on something that’s important, like, well, I look back and think, Oh, I had the opportunity to spend more time with my kids. But I was so distracted by even good things, even ministry, right? I’m distracted by ministry that now I’m not going on date nights with my husband, or I’m not, you know, spending time in the evening with with my girls or watching movies with them. Like, I’m being so productive in these other areas that I’m not actually resting. And that for me, like one of the things that I just I was doing this Bible study that I’ve been a part of, and God gave me some major revelations, which I’ve never been like a picture person, but he showed me a picture of a roller coaster. And I was like, What is this, like this big roller coaster. And he basically I grabbed my journal and I, I have no desire to write a book. But if I did, I just wrote my first chapter. Right? It was like 10 pages. And it was all this word picture about how the way that I ride a roller coaster, is the way that I actually approached my entire life. So but the part that really struck me because right we are on the roller coaster, and like all this enthusiasm and all these word pictures, but it was what I do when I get off the roller coaster. And that’s that I get off the roller coaster after I’ve after I’ve basically wrote it 100 times. And all of a sudden, I look around, and I’m exhausted because I haven’t eaten. I haven’t drink any water. I haven’t taken care of my body. Like I’ve just been Go, go go. But the saddest thing was when I looked around at my family, or the people around me, this was the first time that I even noticed that they’re like, Mom, we’re exhausted. You haven’t sat us you haven’t, you know, like, we’re just because nobody could keep up at my pace, and I pushing and pushing and pushing. And that’s when I went, Oh, like I have to actually get it off the roller coaster and the roller coaster isn’t always bad. But I have to get off the roller coaster. You know, and actually, while I’m on it, I need to look around and evaluate the people around me is my drive. Where are they at? Like, where are they at? And also for me because, again, I got off the roller coaster. And now I’m like, I haven’t eaten. I’m thirsty. I gotta pee. You know, like all the times that I haven’t taken care of, because I’ve been so in it. And that just really made me go God, I want to do a better job of resting in you. So that when I’m on the roller coaster, it’s sustainable. Because I want to know that I’m stewarding Well, this season that he’s given me help. Like I’m healthy. I have, you know, I have a lot of great things going on in my life. But I want to keep those things and I don’t want to run things into the ground. And I don’t want to run those around me, you know, into the ground either. And I have to watch out for

    Paige C. Clark 58:19
    that. Yeah, absolutely. I think also, when you’re saying, only getting your fulfillment from God, and one thing that I’ve been just thinking of over the past few months in the past year, especially being like so engrained in like, the corporate world is also like, getting your identity from God and God alone. Because as you work, it’s really easy to say I’m Cami, and I’m the Director of Operations. Right? Like you ask someone like oh, like, who are you? What do you do? And it’s, I do this for for work, and that’s who I am. And, and really, it’s like, oh, I’m like a daughter of the king. Like I am a follower of Christ. Yeah, struggle identity, you should find bee bee in

    Cami Aufdermauer 59:15
    the switch from the executive director of habitat in my own community, right, where you are a leader in your community, that when I was getting ready to transition out of that role into the role that I’m in now, that was a huge because my identity was like I was Cami, the executive director of habitat. And I knew that when I went to this job, nobody’s going to know my name. I’m now working on a global scale. What I call nobodies like, oh, it’s cameo after Mauer, like in a small town, everybody knows you. So I knew like going over to this job that I was going to wrestle and it was almost like letting go of work. You know, just kind of what you’re saying like that identity and who you are. Are you know, and I think even living in a small town, it’s very easy to just think that’s how it is everywhere. But it’s not like, right, I have to go out. And now I have to introduce myself. And, you know, it’s kind of this whole different thing. And that was a big shift for me and one that I’m really thankful I went through because I now don’t believe that I identify myself. Like I, I think more just, I know, God’s using me in ministry in ways that he’s called me to and gifted me to, but I, I don’t see myself and in this job, making it my identity. Right takes up a lot of my time. And yeah, you know, there’s all that balance there. But I would say, I, that was a very stark transition from one job to the next.

    Paige C. Clark 1:00:50
    Yeah, and I think I think it’s seen a lot. I mean, I can’t really speak for more like blue collar jobs, but definitely in like, corporate kind of white collar jobs. It’s always about what’s your next step? What are you going to do next? How are you going to uplevel? I remember I was at a job and they’re like, oh, what’s your growth plan? And I’m like, hey, my bills, and have kids one day, like, like, my growth plan. And what I wanted for myself was not associated with my job. I’m gonna do my job with excellence. And I’m going to do it well. And whatever happens after that cool, that’s up to God. But like, my, my soul, I guess, like meditation, when it comes to my future is not about my job. And what I do?

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:01:44
    Yeah, no, I can’t relate to that. Because mine was, yeah, it definitely was, especially habitat like, and again, I was the director. So I mean, there was no position above mine. So nobody was ever asking, like, what are your goals here? I just had no idea that someday, I wouldn’t just be working in my own community. So I never had to think about the fact that, like, when I go knock on the door, this person has no idea who I am. So that was a very cool thing for me, because it helped me to get out of my own small, you know, mindedness. Really. I mean, that’s not a bad thing. Like my whole family’s been here. Like, they’ve had amazing careers in this one community. But I didn’t know that was possible for me. And so I’ve never had to think about what would that look like to start knocking on doors where nobody knows your name? You know, like, that was a that was a, it’s been really cool. Like, I haven’t hated it. At first, I was scared. But now it’s like, wow, I even told my husband, I’m like, I could change my name to Kamara and nobody. Please don’t do that. I’m like, Okay, I won’t do that. But all of a sudden, I was like, I could create like, this new identity, although I like who I am. Right? Like it does give you an opportunity to kind of that freedom. We were talking about the work that working from home, I will never forget, because again, brand new for me to work from home. I’ll never forget when I grabbed my laptop, which is like a MacBook Air. So super small, you know, then I held it up to my daughter in the car. I said, Do you want to know something cool. She’s like what I said, anywhere. This laptop can go Mommy can go. And she’s like, really? I’m like, This is my job in this laptop. And it just kind of opened up like, I could go anywhere. I haven’t gone anywhere. You could go somewhere, you know, come visit you and we could Yes. Go sit in the dust storm.

    Paige C. Clark 1:03:37
    Yeah, absolutely. I mean, like with your adventuring. I’m like we should definitely go up to page Have you have you like do you know what page? What is page Arizona? Is the city smelt like like a book page? Not like Right. And it’s on the like the northern most border of Arizona. Probably take like from where I’m at. It’s like a six hour drive. It’s a long drive. But it’s beautiful. Look up horseshoe Canyon. Look up Antelope Canyon. All of those are your so you’re gonna meet me there. Yeah.

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:04:16
    Okay. Sure. Sounds good. I’ll bring my laptop. Well, we’re

    Paige C. Clark 1:04:18
    gonna work party. Yeah, we’ll go up to the snow and like go anyways. Antelope Canyon. If y’all are ever in Arizona, go with you know, one of the tribes. They do the tours up there. And it is beautiful. And it’s crazy because I was like I heard Canyon. And I was thinking like, like, you’re on the ground and the mountains go up, and you’re in the canyon that you go down to the earth and that’s the canyon. Oh, yeah. It’s trippy like you there’s a crack in the ground and that’s what you climb. bid. How do you get out? You climb a ladder? Oh, wow. Yeah, it’s awesome. Anyways, Cami we should make that happen.

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:05:09
    I love it. I love even if I went nowhere, I love knowing that I can. And I know I will. But also in due season, right, so like, I just I love opportunity to look at what’s out there. And like, okay, where to next God again, I lived in this community my whole life. But that’s not to say I couldn’t go somewhere else right? Maybe someday I will. I never thought that was an option.

    Paige C. Clark 1:05:36
    I love that. I love that. Well, Cami, let’s wrap it up with what is one thing our listeners can do to implement a faith building discipline or practice in their life this week?

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:05:50
    Well, besides get a Trello board, because seriously, create some margin, honestly, like I, I again, I think it takes resources to get you to where you want to go. And so I’m just going to recommend a resource. And that, again, is that to buy the dream, I dare you book. Really, truly, this book is what catapulted me to where I am today, mindset wise, but also career wise, also how to dream all those things. So that would be kind of my, my one charge is get this book, because this book is really what changed the game for me.

    Paige C. Clark 1:06:31
    I can’t wait and your book is on

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:06:33
    your way, lady, it’s in the mail right now.

    Paige C. Clark 1:06:37
    Shut out. That’s exciting. I was gonna say I need to read it. I have actually on my desk, I have 1-234-567-8910 or 11 books that are on my list for the year. So that one will get moved to the top of the stack.

    Cami Aufdermauer 1:06:58
    It’s a small group study too. So it comes with a workbook. So I’ll send you the workbook as well. Oh, um, because that’s really where the depth comes in. Right. And I’m excited to see you take that journey because it’s, it changed the game. Changed it all for me.

    Paige C. Clark 1:07:12
    Awesome. Cami, thank you so much for joining us and we’ll catch you guys next week. Thanks for joining us. If you liked what you were listening to make sure you subscribe and hit those five stars and we’ll catch you on the next episode.

     

  • 9 to 5 Faith Podcast: Episode 09

    9 to 5 Faith Podcast

    This is a transcript from episode 09 of the 9 to 5 Faith Podcast with Paige C. Clark.

    Share on Social

    Start of Podcast

    Paige C. Clark 00:02
    All right, hello everyone happy. Whatever day you’re listening this on this will be released on a Saturday. So if you’re listening to it on a Saturday, happy Saturday, I’m here with my friend DeeDee. How’re you doing today?

    DeeDee Lake 00:16
    I am doing really well. I’m tickled to be here with you.

    Paige C. Clark 00:19
    I’m so excited. I’m excited that this can happen today and that all the stars aligned and we were able to talk about life and military life and how to fit God into all of that. And I’m just I’m so excited for this conversation. Me too. Me too. And you’re like continuing kind of the theme of your life of moving a whole lot. And you just moved and you’re in a brand new house right now. So that’s exciting.

    DeeDee Lake 00:48
    There, we decided that we wanted to, we live in Colorado Springs area and wanted to come down and spend some time over the last eight, nine years we’ve been doing that to spend time with their grandkids in San Antonio. So we’ve got a year we’ve been looking for property, couldn’t find it went home back to Colorado. And within three weeks, we saw a house and bought it down here in Burnie so yeah, it’s pretty like, oh my gosh, so yes, exactly like the military life for you.

    Paige C. Clark 01:14
    All crazy. So can you tell our listeners a little bit about you?

    DeeDee Lake 01:19
    So I’ve been married almost 40 years, I have two adopted children. They’re adults now both married and providing grandbabies doing exactly what they’re supposed to. And then I grew up as a Navy brat and was an army wife. So Army Navy Day football game, not a good day in our house. Since I’ve been an army wife longer than a navy brat, I decided to go army.

    Paige C. Clark 01:45
    Very good. And are you still living the military life or since retired?

    DeeDee Lake 01:51
    We are retired, but it’s still a military life. Like you’d never quite get away from it. Just using this new neighborhood. We almost all of our neighbors are retired military. So we have that in common. And so it gives you that bond, no matter where you go, you know?

    Paige C. Clark 02:07
    That’s really nice. Yeah, for sure. And what do you do for like your regular nine to five,

    DeeDee Lake 02:13
    so my regular nine to five, I have three different jobs. And that all of them pay well. Fine. So a wedding officiant in Colorado and love that I actually did 40 weddings in 13 months. Wow. Figure it out and loved it every minute of it. Because it’s so neat to be able to see the people’s faces like I have the best seat in the house. I didn’t know I right there. You know, like when He winks at her or she smiles or whatever. It’s like, I’m right there. So it’s so much fun to do those. And then I’m a writer and speaker. So I’ve written a couple of books. And then also I work for a Christian publishing house crossover media, and I am their author, relations coordinator. That means I am the cheerleader for the authors. I hold their hand through the about two year process of, you know, from beginning of manuscript to getting it to the market.

    Paige C. Clark 03:02
    Oh, that’s awesome. And like, as you’re describing those things, I just like, sing like yep, that that fits. Yeah, that sounds that sounds just about right for you and your personality, and just the energy that you’re exuding. It feels you know, just about right?

    DeeDee Lake 03:20
    Every job I’ve ever had had something to do with chatty now. I don’t know if it was in the actual job description, or if I just kind of made it about chatting, but yeah, and connecting. That’s my my heart is about connecting.

    Paige C. Clark 03:32
    Yeah. As StrengthsFinder Are you connector?

    DeeDee Lake 03:36
    Yes, actually. Yep. Whoo. But I’m gonna find out. I was not aware. I was quite disappointed. But then I realized, no, that wasn’t my strength.

    Paige C. Clark 03:45
    Yeah, yeah, for sure. So take us through a little bit of like, what your day to day life looks like and how, how do you incorporate your faith into your daily work and what that looks like, and even in the military? Talk a little bit about that. And like what I mean, y’all move a lot.

    DeeDee Lake 04:10
    Actually, this is our 51st house I live in. I’ve lived in 50. And so I’ve moved around a little bit more than a lot of people did. But yeah, it was quite a bit. So day to day. So I grew up in nonbeliever, and my parents didn’t go to church, they they had both grown up in the church, but didn’t really share that with us. And I think part of that problem was because we were military, it was hard for them to get connected. It really is. If you’re intentional about it. It doesn’t just sort of happen. You know, I think that way was everyone but especially the military because you every two, three years you’re moving you know, or three or four years. And so it’s hard to get some people have a hard time getting connected. And that was my case, I think with my parents and then for me, once I married my husband, we were believers and so we always that was like our first thing that we will Look forward to like, you get your orders and or your say you might be going someplace you look online or you, you know, call people, Hey, do you know somebody there? So for that, that was important, you have to do it that way. But as far as putting things in my daily life, I work for a Christian organization, I write Christian things. The only part that really isn’t is I married people that aren’t, aren’t Christian believers. And they know though that my faith and so it’s kind of neat, because a lot of times will ask me questions, it gives me an opportunity to say, you know, we’ve been married almost 40 years, and this is why it works. And we have a great marriage, my husband stuff. And so it’s kind of neat to have that as an example to be able to kind of lead into talking about God.

    Paige C. Clark 05:41
    Yeah, my gosh, and I could go on a separate rampage about like, how much easier marriage is when you are both believers and stepping into that, because it just makes things a lot easier and a lot more centered, because you’re going for the same thing. When you’re married to another believer, so yeah, definitely.

    DeeDee Lake 06:03
    We, a lot of the people, not a lot, about a third of the people that I marry are not believers, or not strong believers. And so funny because I still pray for him pray over them, you know, not without their knowledge as to whoever I want to know. So I at home, I write for them and their relationship. And I have a goal that none of the people that I officiate will ever be separated. So that’s my I don’t know if they will, because I don’t get in touch with them. But that’s my hope.

    Paige C. Clark 06:29
    That’s beautiful. So tell me a little bit about your, your job of working as author relations.

    DeeDee Lake 06:39
    What’s the title, the author, relations coordinator coordinator,

    Paige C. Clark 06:42
    I was gonna say, coordinator, but I like author relations coordinator. And you said you work for a Christian organization, how much is your faith intertwined, and like your ability to practice and like Minister your faith in that?

    DeeDee Lake 06:58
    So I work, my job was created just for me. I met Tamra climber who is the publisher for and she’s the one who started the company. There’s only three of us actually, that work for the company. And we’re all in three different different states. We have an editor Deb Butterfield, and then Tammy. So I met Tammy at a Christian writers conference one year and we just connected we both are adopted moms, and you know, just all these different stories. And so the next year when I saw her mean that she was on my heart all year long, so I thought, You know what, when I see her next time, I’m gonna ask her a question. So we’re sitting around the fireplace, and I said, Hey, can I Is there something I could do that i where we could work together, you don’t mean necessarily should have to pay me I just wanted to be in relationship, you know, rounder, because I just loved what she did. And so she thought about it, she was like, okay, you know, she came up with this author relations, because she really needed somebody to, you know, to connect with them. And that’s how my faith really worked for me in my job is because I am a strong believer in pretty much every thing I say, has something to do with being about the Lord or, you know, every conversation somehow or another gets brought around to that. And it’s great to be able to just been encouraged or you know, sometimes, well, not sometimes writing is a very lonely job, you know, and so I’ve gotten off, there’s a lot of them are very introverted. To start with. That’s I one of the weird ones is an extrovert. But basically, you’re either a writer that learns that has to learn to speak to promote your book, or you’re a speaker first, and then you have to write a book, so you can get contracts. That’s been, um, the second one, so I was. And so which is good, though, because I encouraged the ladies I’m able to pray with them. I always pray with them. It just, you know, I check in with him, you know, it’s like, Hey, how’s life going? And and so those whole conversations are just like, sitting down having coffee with your friend, you know, your, your Christian believer, friend. And they’re all at different levels. Some of them are really strong Christian, some are, you know, newer. And so it’s kind of neat, just to be able to mentor them. Really? Yeah. They call myself the writer, Wrangler, because, you know, I lived in Colorado, so a good writer, but they’re like, yeah, no.

    Paige C. Clark 09:04
    needs to be a little bit more formal than that. Yeah, exactly. And I probably fall into the small like, 1% of authors who are actually very extroverted. I’m right there with you. So I feel that and I think also, it might depend on like, what genre you write in, because I found this might be stereotyping, but I found fiction authors to be a little bit more introspective, and then nonfiction authors to be a little bit more out there.

    DeeDee Lake 09:37
    Yeah, yeah. Definitely. I write both. So I’m kind of like, you know, a little double brained or whatever. But yeah.

    Paige C. Clark 09:45
    So when you were in the military and traveling around you said that, you know, you were making, finding kind of a faith community a priority. What did that look like for you and how did you, you know, kind of first temporary season find your people. Yeah.

    DeeDee Lake 10:03
    So one, one thing that always that we did was we never looked at it as temporary. Because we know where we’re all going, you know. And so I get to see him up in heaven, we’ll get to celebrate and you know, laugh and joke, I think, I don’t know if we’ll get the laugh and joke, but that’s my extroverted mind, that’s what we’re gonna be doing is having fun. But we always looked at it as like, we’re planting roots as quick as we can. Just really putting ourselves in those positions. And in places where you could meet people, you’re gonna be like, most people are not gonna come knock on your door, go, Hey, I’m a believer, I want to love on you. We can, like, it doesn’t normally happen. It could. But so we just always, yeah, we met our neighbors, we would go to different activities like community activities. And I think as a believer, you’re kind of drawn to other believers, you know, like, there’s that presence about them. That’s like, oh, okay, they have something different. So that was one, I think a big thing was that we always made it as a permanent situation. And you know, because you don’t know. And I have friends from my best friend, when we were in junior high seventh grade, we’re still friends, I still go visit or, you know, we hang out, we talk to each other. So that’s really, you know, kind of fun, especially now with Facebook and on social media that Yeah, I mean, a lot easier.

    Paige C. Clark 11:19
    Yeah, yeah, for sure. And did you find it easier to relate or connect with other military, Christian families? Or did you have to kind of step outside of that military community? And then go find kind of some, some church community within that?

    DeeDee Lake 11:39
    That’s a really great question. So the military, when we first went in, you know, it was a while back and didn’t really have the support system that they have. Now, you know, they really support Army family team building, they’ve got, you know, small groups and stuff like that board. But what I kind of found was that there was a lot of negativity in that part, I even say that, but it’s true, you know, there’s some unhappy people in the world, they don’t like the changes, they don’t like their husbands, you know, leaving and those kinds of things. So I kind of avoided those, purposely I went, I would always go like one or two times. So they knew my face, they knew who I was. And then I looked at my church as my support and, and that really makes a difference, because then it does give you some time to be outside of the military stress, because that sounds very stressful. Even if you’re not changing, you know, somebody that is, you know, like, they’re very young, possibly deployed all those things. And not to the civilian world doesn’t have those same kind of stresses. But it just gives you a moment to be away, you know, to connect and be like, Okay, this is real life, you know, the military. So we would usually go to church, outside of the church outside of the pose.

    Paige C. Clark 12:50
    Yeah. And, and what was the best thing that the church did for you in kind of the situation that you found yourself in?

    DeeDee Lake 13:02
    So my husband, I were married seven years and couldn’t have children. We both knew that. So it wasn’t a surprise or anything. But we got to Panama. And I just knew that that when we were in Korea first, and I felt like God just said, I’ve got a baby for you. I felt it so strongly that I thought, well, this is a little, you know, perky. But I walked out church that day, I’m thinking, where’s my baby? Like? You said, I’m gonna have a baby, right? nine to nine, what’s one fix to make one of those. So our next duty station was Panama’s six weeks after we got there. They, we told everybody that we wanted to adopt that we would meet all the strangers that we knew, because that’s what the advice we’ve been given. And so we went there. And in six hours notice we got our daughter, the missionaries brought her Yeah, it was pretty cool. And so the church stepping in and just really mentoring is because now I’m a new mom, and really had no concept of what to do with the baby. Like, all that time. I was like, No, I don’t want to baby I don’t want to have children. God, you’re you’re great. You brought me this man. And I can’t have children. We’re all good, right? And God changed the terms. Or at least he finally revealed them to be a mom. So we had a four month old little girl that we adopted and just the church was our family. We really saw how, how God develops a Church, His Bride to be a family. Yeah.

    Paige C. Clark 14:22
    And I like for some reason, my brain just got stuck into this idea of like, having orders domestically. And like you said, Panama, like, Yeah, you had orders internationally, which I think poses an additional layer of complexity over it.

    DeeDee Lake 14:43
    Yeah, it definitely did. But it was also easier. You know, in Panama, adopting a baby was at that time we were talking about 32 years ago, so I just want my daughter’s age. But so it wasn’t so hard like it is in the States, but both of our adopted we adopted a son later when we were in the States and we joke around because he was from New York City. And we say that’s our other foreign country that we adopted from we were in Alabama at the time. So that’s where, again, though, that was our military connections that allowed us to know that this baby was available in New York. Yeah, yeah. That’s pretty cool.

    Paige C. Clark 15:17
    Wow, that’s incredible. But also like getting connected to the church community. And in foreign countries, it looks a little bit different.

    DeeDee Lake 15:27
    It does. It’s actually easier. Okay. Yes. And the reason I say that is that here in the States, we tend to our faith is just sort of, you know, part of who we are, you know, it’s like a, I call it, it’s more situational. It’s not a relationship, you know, so much, like, especially if you’re in the south, you’re just kind of expected to go to church, but you’re not except expected necessarily to live all for God and to, you know, be black and white about it, basically. But so like, we’re a Panama, there was so much stuff that like voodoo, and all that kind of stuff that was around. So it’s very easy to see that spiritual battle going on, that we I think that Satan here in the States kind of softens it, or makes us feel like it’s often but it’s not. So very, like you’re either for the Lord or you’re not in Panama is what? Yeah. And Korea the same way. So that was that wow, experience.

    Paige C. Clark 16:21
    That’s incredible. And also, I’ve heard that South Korea has like one of the largest Christian populations to in the world now. Yeah, yeah.

    DeeDee Lake 16:34
    I got to go, I can’t remember the name of the church. But that church that’s like, you know, 1000s of people that go to it, I actually got to go, our choir was invited from the chapel, because that’s how we’re going to the chapel. And we got to go there. And I didn’t really know anything about the church. This was before you get to google anything. And so we show up, and there’s like, 1620 of us, whatever, in this little choir. And we’re sitting there and all of a sudden, as we’re singing this choir of angels, we’re like, oh, my gosh, so by, and finally, I’m like, Oh, they’re right behind us. There’s like 100 and something people back behind this. So they were just enjoying the service. But yeah, it was fun. Because it was like, God to heaven. So yeah.

    Paige C. Clark 17:17
    That’s too funny. So kind of bringing it back to the present. What? How do you make sure that you find your one on one time with God? So your wife, a mom, a grandma, you know, you’re moving you have all these fun? Kind of? I don’t want to call them side hustles? Because they are, they are but also it doesn’t feel like that you have you have all these other projects that that are going on? How do you make sure that you find your one on one time with God and like you’re able to like cultivate your faith in that way?

    DeeDee Lake 17:55
    Well, there’s a couple of things I tried to. So I listen to the word like when I go to sleep, I just put it on and I fell asleep to the word which is really cool to be able to do that. And being an empty nester, now, it’s pretty easy, I can do it whenever I want, you know, and having my schedule that I have, I’m able to say, You know what, I’m gonna do this from eight to nine. But back when I did have children at home, they knew if they came in the room and saw me with my Bible open, you know that it was like, that was my time. And also, one of the things I really recommend people do is create a space that is a cozy space, we did that in every single house we were at. And the cozy space was where we’d have conversations with the kids that maybe were pretty strong, or you know, emotional. But it was also the place it was a cuddle spot. And it was a place that we are myself but sit and read the Word. And so that was my time to be with the Lord. So that for me, I think creating the space makes you when you walk by it, you’re like, oh, I’ll just to be sitting there and remind you without being harsh, you know, it’s like, oh, yeah, let’s let’s go in there and spend some time with the Lord.

    Paige C. Clark 19:00
    Yeah. So tell me about this cozy space. Like, what isn’t it? Like, how did you start it because I’m also thinking like, everyone listening is like, I want a cozy space.

    DeeDee Lake 19:11
    No, everyone should have a cozy space is that place that’s not in the middle of everything that you can get quiet in. It’s usually a place that has really beautiful sunlight in it. It’s not too hot, not too cold. It’s just that beautiful place and you make it beautiful with a soft light, a cozy chair that you want to or we always had a loveseat because or, or oversize when like a chair that like two or three people could sit in was supposed to be a chair. And I always made sure I got one of those or had one in that it’s basically a corner. Yeah, like picked up about your prayer closet. This was my corner that I asked. And I would do that no matter where we’re at. And, um, I am noticing that my kids are starting to create those two, which I think is really cool.

    Paige C. Clark 19:54
    That’s beautiful. Yeah, I have. I have this chair in my office and it Funny enough, my husband calls it my pouting chair. So like, when I’m angry, I like go sit in this chair, like I’m putting myself in timeout. But it’s also like the most is one of those chairs that’s big enough that you can tuck your legs up in, and, like still comfortably sit in it. And so I’m like, that would be the chair that would go in my cozy space.

    DeeDee Lake 20:21
    So typically, I’d have a nice light that I can, you know, see my Bible, you know, with, but also not glaring. So it’s just, it really keeps it in that cozy sort of, you know, Coffee House sort of feeling, you know, I have those couches and stuff. And then usually a table so I can make sure I have my coffee, you know, better. So yeah, that was what we did.

    Paige C. Clark 20:42
    And I found to like, when I’m creating spaces, or environments, like that, kind of having everything set up in like a state of permanency in that place. That way, when you’re sitting there, I’m like, also, like, I have shiny object syndrome. So like, I’m like, if I need to get up to go get like a pen or something, I might get distracted by something else and go off on a tangent and then like, lose my spot. So like having that having a place that’s kind of like prepared for what you’re doing?

    DeeDee Lake 21:14
    Well, our body has like those memories of you know, or, I’m not sure how muscleman memory, you know, basically. So like my office that I have that I write in, I speak, you know, do things like this. That’s all I do in there, I don’t play games on my computer in there, I only work in that space. And so when I go in there, my body is ready to be or my mind or whatever is ready to be like, Okay, it’s time to work. The same thing with the cozy spot. When I sit in the cozy spot. It’s like, okay, this is time to unplug it, you know, just relax here. And what’s nice about that, too, is if you do that, it teaches your children like, Oh, I’m in this space, this is my cozy spot. This is my quiet place, you know, so to get quiet with your spirit, not why like you still talk but Right. And it really trains them that way. I think a lot of moms, especially young moms have a hard time with their children, teaching them that and you just have to I mean, that’s just something and you’ll be glad that you did you. Were here this is you know, kind of like the library. But yeah,

    Paige C. Clark 22:15
    yeah, I love that. I love that. So you have your cozy space, and you kind of have your routine. And I think that working from home because you work remote, I work remote to for my job. I think it adds a layer of simplicity and complexity. At the same time. When it comes to our routine and our rhythms through throughout our life. It’s very easy to get sucked into things on off hours. And it’s very easy to get distracted by things on on hours. So how do you balance that for yourself?

    DeeDee Lake 22:52
    I put it on my schedule. Definitely I put it on the schedule. I’m not like super strict about it. But I once heard, I think it was a pastor was talking about like, we put all these different things in our schedule, work, a doctor’s appointment, whatever. But the most important thing is our relationship with price. And we never put it on the schedule. So he said the first thing you do just like you tied, you know, with your money, slides with your time. So when you’re gonna say okay, this is what we’re doing next week. The first thing is, I go to church, or I’m going to spend my quiet time at this time. And then again, it goes back to that muscle memory that says you know what, this is my routine. This is what my body feels good when I when I do this. Not all like who do duty, whatever you don’t say, naturally, that’s who we are. We feel better when our the Lord. So putting out my schedule really makes a difference. And also being in a Bible study keeps me accountable. I like that when I’m going to Bible study, I noticed that I’m better at it when I have, you know, other ladies that I’m going to meet with and be like, oh, yeah, they’re gonna be like, So how was your week? Ah, you don’t sit down and spend time with it. I can almost guarantee you is a crazy week for you. But even if everything’s going crazy, and you split time with the Lord, your your day just doesn’t feel is out of control.

    Paige C. Clark 24:05
    Yeah, yeah. And I also even like, you know, second and third that accountability piece because like, even even with my husband, I we don’t do it every night. But like, every now and then at the end of the day, he’ll be like, how did you see God move in your life today? And I’m like, did I even pay attention to God today? Like, Yeah, real talk. Like that’s a real life sometimes. And it’s, you know, having that accountability is like a gut check of like, ooh, like, did I even like talk to God? Did he even like, did I even consider him today in the midst of everything else that was going on?

    DeeDee Lake 24:43
    I think to the more you mature in your face, it becomes such a natural routine for you that yeah, like I was saying about every conversation I have somehow another turns around to God or you know, and I don’t do it on purpose. I mean, just just who I am. Just do what God says what you put in come Without and so that makes a difference. And eventually people will stop wanting to talk to you about anything but the Lord. So like, Okay.

    Paige C. Clark 25:08
    Absolutely, absolutely. And, and I think too, there’s a lot of shame and maybe stigma over the need to schedule him these things. And I think that we have to, as a culture accept the fact that we are far we have a lot of stimulus happening more than other generations and cultures that came before us.

    DeeDee Lake 25:36
    Absolutely. I always say that being a mom or dad today is way harder than when my kids were younger. I mean, I admire anybody that does it well, because, I mean, you got the whole world of fighting against you wanting to come into your home and, and, and their friends and their family. I mean, we have problems a little bit when our kids were in high school, that, you know, we raised them a certain way, and they would go to a friend’s house that was a Christian home, but they just weren’t as strong in their faith, maybe, or maybe didn’t implement it as much, you know, and right. And so, you know, there’s some criticism, but we’re like, you know, what, we’re gonna do what we’re gonna do. Our son was funny, he would get mad at us, because we would let him go to parties where they were drinking. Yeah, in high school, you know? And yeah, yeah, he would always Yeah, they’re gonna be drinking. So like, why would we let you go? Right. But now as an adult, he’s like, oh, yeah, that was, that was really good. I’m glad you guys watched out for me, you know, I’m just having to that accountability, I was gonna say that, we want to make sure that we’re giving grace to, you know, whenever anybody’s struggling. And remember, there are seasons, I remember when my babies were little. And our son was, he was like, 10. And one. I mean, he just was active. And people were funny, they would come up to me and say, Oh, he’s so busy. I’m like,

    Paige C. Clark 26:55
    I didn’t notice. Like the frazzled,

    DeeDee Lake 26:58
    I would get a little jealous, I think of when I go to Bible studies, and there’s these older women there that, you know, had nobody at home to take care of it themselves. And they’d get through their whole Bible study where I might have three days done, you know, what, I just had some really great mentors that said, you know, what, you’ll do what you can. And it’s just a season, you know, there’ll be a season later that you’ll be able to spend hours with the Lord, if that’s what you want. But just remember to give yourself grace, and God does give us that, you know, he’s not expecting 24 hours a day for us to you know, he knows we have kids, we knows we have a schedule. Yeah, so not surprising. Yeah. And

    Paige C. Clark 27:35
    I think it’s, you know, having those moments where like, they say, you know, glitter gets just everywhere. And I think like, we just need to make God our glitter and just like, have him everywhere. So as we’re moving throughout our day, we find, oh, there’s a piece of glitter. Like,

    DeeDee Lake 27:53
    I love that. I once heard, and it’s probably been around a lot. But that is there a net if being a Christian was against the law, is there enough Christ in your life around your environments, and who you talk about what you say, who you hang out with, to convict you. And you so you look around your home, if somebody walks in your home, can they tell you’re a believer, that’s important, not that you’re doing it to show off or to be that, you know, Pharisee, whatever, but just that you just who you are, like, you know, my son brought me across him and his wife brought me this beautiful cross, it has parts from, you know, the old country in it, and I’m just very symbolic. And I thought that was so neat. You know, so I’ve got that on my wall. You know, yeah, we asked me about is like, oh, yeah, this is what this means. And you know, so I just think that we need to make sure that when we’re there when we’re in our home, that when we look around, we can tell? Yeah, I’m a believer.

    Paige C. Clark 28:47
    Yeah. Yeah. And also, like, not only can it you know, if Christianity was made to be illegal, not only like, Can we stay in conviction, but can we still sit in our faith? You know, do we know the word enough? Do we? Are we surrounded by people who know the word enough? Do we have enough inputs in our life, to be able to sustain that?

    DeeDee Lake 29:12
    Exactly. One of the things that we’ve always looked for is really great mentors. And sometimes mentors are a little bit younger than you, they’re not always older. You know, as far as their faith, they may be way further than you are. But surrounding yourself with those kinds of people that when you go to them and say, you know, I got an issue, I just don’t know what to do. Instead of you know, becoming a nag fest or whatever, it’s, it’s you guys sitting down praying together, you know, I’m showing you the word that we’re that can heal, you know, whatever the situation is.

    Paige C. Clark 29:42
    Yeah. And I mean, it might, it might be flippant, but one thing that I’ve been doing so I work in social media, so I’m on social media all the time. And one thing that I’ve been starting to do with like my personal accounts I’ve just started then like engaging with other Christian accounts that just talked about Jesus and, you know, other just other believers. And I’ve noticed such, like an attitude shift in me, in my heart when I’m in taking all of this, like goodness, I guess, via Instagram, versus, you know, the things of like I want to be or things that sort of jealousy or, you know, longing in me for things of this world that don’t belong, right? Yeah. And so it was so interesting because I, it’s, it’s been slow. And it’s been happening over the past, like, two months or so. But it’s like, oh, this is like, so much more fulfilling to have these kinds of people speaking into my life via Instagram versus things that will pull me away from God. Absolutely.

    DeeDee Lake 30:53
    I just recently heard that, how a whale dies. And a whale is a mammal. So it needs air to breathe. But it lives in this water, you know, almost like it eventually it drowns is how it dies. And I’m like, How could a whale die like that, you know, but he was comparing it to, you know, us as believers, we’re here in this world, but we’re not of the world, you know, we might breathe in it, but it’s not our constant place and having to remember ourselves that who we are, you know, and but doing on social media is so funny, because people have always like, oh, there’s so much negative on there. I’m like, none on mine. There’s not and I really don’t write, because I don’t allow those kinds of people into my life. And that’s something that’s really important, goes back to boundaries. I’m so love the book boundaries. Yeah, I preach about it all the time. And when you have great boundaries, you don’t have to worry about all that junk coming in. Because it’s like, yeah, we’re gonna put it on there. If they do take it off, you know?

    Paige C. Clark 31:50
    Yeah. And I think too, this is a little bit of a tangent. But I mean, I work in social media. So it has to do with my job. But I think one thing that I talked to other small businesses about, because I get a lot of questions when I when I’m coaching, marketing, and they’re like, What do I do about negative comments? And like, bah, bah, bah. And like, it’s your space? Like your time out with a cozy space? Yeah, it’s your space, that you get to dictate what is in your space. And same with social media and your online presence, it’s yours, you can’t you are choosing to be there. And yes, like, meta owns, you know, half the world at this point. But like, you’re creating this community and this energy around what you’re doing, and you get to decide what’s in there.

    DeeDee Lake 32:41
    And you have to remember to do that. I think Jesus can read social media. So not that I think he has, you know, a laptop or anything, but you know, he knows what’s going on there. So you want to make sure that wherever you are, you’re representing who you are, no matter where it’s at, if it’s with your friends or with strangers at work, you know, in your car. It was like, I know my husband had this really neat guy that he worked with, but the guy was a little higher rank than him. And he would not allow people to curse around him. And in the army, which is very well, no, yeah, happen. But if people were going to curse, he’s like, You need to leave my office, and he would make them leave his office, no matter what rank they were, he was like, this is a cusp rezone. And I was so impressed with that, because that mean, that was probably when we were really new believers. And so you can’t do that. But I remember back to my dad telling me when I was in high school, he’s like, people will talk to you how you allow them to talk to you. So it goes back to that same thing with social media. It’s like if you stand there and let all that junk in on there. Yeah. Or in your job, even in your job. You still don’t need to have people talking like that. But you can’t talk like that, either. Right? talking trash that it’s like, you’re sitting you make expensive, just you can’t you can’t do that either have to be for the Lord or not.

    Paige C. Clark 33:52
    Yeah, and I think it’s just like, it’s these little things that we can set up in our life to create the boundaries. So we are just more set up for finding God’s glitter.

    DeeDee Lake 34:06
    My My son was funny because he didn’t want me to meet this other family, people, this group of people, I’m gonna say it was but and I was like, why? He’s like, Well, they curse and I’m like, Uh huh. Like, but you know, I could still be at a dinner with them. I don’t have to be all you know, the whole time with them, but I get to love on them. And they actually started calling me sister Diddy because I pray that was so funny. Oh, like, okay.

    Paige C. Clark 34:32
    They know I pray for them. So yeah, I love that. Um, so kind of rounding out this conversation. What is one thing and this like, I wrote this question, and then afterwards I’ve been asking other guests all this I’m like, I’m like really putting y’all on blast. But I’m just kind of go for it. But what is the biggest struggle you have when it comes to Practicing your faith

    DeeDee Lake 35:04
    is actually sitting down and reading my Bible, you know, and what makes me mad with that is that I love reading my Bible. So like, why it’s, it’s getting the noise out of your life, I think it’s really what is the case, turn off your phone, put that away from you or whatever. Because you, you need that time. It’s like a feed you that’s your food. And you got to spend time with that. And I really do struggle with that too. And that’s one of the reasons that I’ve kind of learned some other ways. Like we listen to praise music in our car, we listen to the gods, we’re, you know, when we go to sleep, or if I wake up or whatever, but just having, making sure I put those moments in there is really, it has to be intentional. It doesn’t just happen. And so I’m learning to do more and more, there’s like, gets to be an old lady,

    Paige C. Clark 35:48
    for sure. And the other thing on this is like, I don’t want anyone listening to think like, we got it down pat. Like, like, we’re not perfect, like I very much struggle to like sit down and read my read scripture, mostly because I get in my own head where I’m like, I’m more of like a study or, and a processor. So when I like sit down, I like go through this like rabbit trail I don’t like it takes me a lot longer than I intend to. And I know it’s gonna take me a lot longer, so I don’t do it.

    DeeDee Lake 36:24
    I’m a type A extreme extrovert. So to sit down and be quiet has always been a struggle for me. But as I get older, I will say it’s a lot easier now than it used to be. But definitely just making your getting quiet, you know, is probably my biggest struggle.

    Paige C. Clark 36:40
    Yeah, I mean, but we have to put the things in our life to help us where we do struggle, putting the routines and the boundaries and the reminders and the scheduler in our life. So we can remember that. Well, DeeDee, I always like to wrap up the conversations with what is one thing that someone can do, after listening to this podcast, what is one thing that they can do in their life, to help grow their faith to practice a spiritual discipline, whatever it might be, get them closer to God this week. One of the

    DeeDee Lake 37:17
    things that we did and still do, even this, this move my 51st house that I’m living in, I started praying as soon as we knew we were going to move that God would bring Christian friends and Christian mentors to us. I was and I also pray for my neighbors, you know that God would bring somebody in, it’s like, we could be coffee neighbors, you know, it’s always my thing. I was like, if you have coffee, even before I start drinking coffee, I was just like, you know, somebody that I could spend time with. And it was neat, because when we were in Korea, and you know, we had a couple mentors there, but not real strong. But that’s really where we started getting to know the Lord. And we’re like, okay, but now we’re going to Panama, we don’t know anybody. So I just asked the Lord was like, Lord, please let us have one mentor, especially for self, my husband, who’s who’s in the battle, really, because I was stay at home mom at the time. And he had to go in and do the Battle of, you know, being with the army, you know, and still standing strong as a believer. But so he, we got to Panama. And it was so neat, because we went to this church off post that we didn’t know anything about, we just went there. And it was a Panamanian, an American speaking, English speaking congregation, they had two different services. And so what we found out later, but not very long afterwards, that most of the missionaries in that area that were in the jungle, they would come for their time in the city, to our church that we went to also almost everybody in there, they knew they were military, or they retired military. But the third thing was they were teachers in the Panama Canal Zone, like teachers, like they’re just naturally mentors, you know, so just give us one minute or you give us a whole church full. That’s where we changed. We changed so much that my mom actually went to a pastor here in the States, and said, I think my daughter and son in law are in a cult. And the pastor was like, Well, what’s going on since you told him and he’s like, I wish all people were that kind of coat. I mean, it was just such an experience of those mentors speaking. I mean, it changed us completely, you know, our way of thinking the way we live. And I mean, it was just not that we were crazy wild or anything before, but it just made us more intentional. I think that’s the biggest thing. And it’s been kind of saturated with Oh, yeah, that’s a great word. Yeah, we were saturated, and loved it and still do. So we still have mentors that I just got a message two days ago from my girl, one of my great mentors that I had, she lives in Florida. She’s like, Hey, you’re doing great, you know, she saw that I’m getting my book coming out. So that that’s really neat to continue to have that. 58 So I still get encouragement,

    Paige C. Clark 39:49
    you know? Yeah. So. So for all those listening, be praying about Christian friends and Christian mentors. And if you have one in your life that you haven’t Talk to us about it. I’ll be praying for a spirit of boldness and that you do take that step

    DeeDee Lake 40:06
    out. Yeah, absolutely. That’s,

    Paige C. Clark 40:08
    that is awesome prayer. Yeah. So, Dini, thank you so much for this conversation. And you’ve mentioned this a few times, and I want to learn more. Where can people find you? And what’s this book you’re talking about?

    DeeDee Lake 40:22
    So, my website is DD lake. So it’s D E, D, E, my mom and dad love E’s and DS, I think so DD lake.com. And you can find me there. But also, you can also email me it’s D to like the number two. So v squared, basically. But my book is I started writing a book when we’re in Panama, where we’re really started changing our lives. It’s a Christian romance set in a military setting. And 30 something years ago, I started writing this and over the years, I’ve had encouragers. Well, a few years back, I met somebody and she’s now my co author. And we have seven books coming out in this rules of engagement series. I’ll show you the first one. The first one. It’s right there. It’s counting operation camouflage Christmas. The next one is actually the first in the series. This was just kind of a little beforehand, to kind of get you interested, but it follows this family and it’s great family that all five of their kids are connected to the military, somehow. We talk about all kinds of different issues that military families have just we wanted to highlight the military lifestyle as a believer. And so your podcast was exactly what I’m like, Oh, my god, is this exactly what we’re writing about? So the next week of Operation allegiance comes out on the 21st of

    Paige C. Clark 41:35
    March. That’s so exciting. Well, thank you so much, DeeDee. And everyone go buy her book for any teens in your life. Yeah.

    DeeDee Lake 41:45
    Oh, that’s for adults do. Yeah, adults, adults. So it’s clean.

    Paige C. Clark 41:50
    So, young adults. Well, we’ll put them in the young adults. Yeah, there you go. All right. Thank you so much, DeeDee. And we’ll catch you guys on the next episode. Thanks, Paige.

  • 9 to 5 Faith Podcast: Episode 6

    This is a transcript from episode 6 of the 9 to 5 Faith Podcast with Paige C. Clark.

    Share on Social

    Start of Podcast

    Paige C. Clark 00:00
    This is Paige C Clark and you’re listening to the nine to five faith podcast. Hi, everyone. Welcome to this episode. I’m here with my friend Carla. Carla, how are you doing today?

    Carla H. Hayden 00:48
    I’m doing so good. It is the beginning of March. We’ve made it. We’ve made it through February, the shortest and yet the longest month?

    Paige C. Clark 00:56
    Yes, it is crazy that like, we’re still only like two months into the year and it feels like it’s been a long year thus far.

    Carla H. Hayden 01:07
    It’s been a long year.

    Paige C. Clark 01:08
    Yes. Well, so glad to have you on the podcast. And so glad to have this conversation. Because again, I say this a lot. But I can’t relate to celebrity speakers, or infamous people, I can relate to normal people. And I think there’s a lot of people out there who are normal people. So let’s talk about life in a normal person’s, and then normal person’s world. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself?

    Carla H. Hayden 01:37
    Yeah, so I am a single mom of three, I have three young adult children. And my nine to five, if you will, is I am actually in a new assignment. I just started a new job about three months ago, I’m the Chief People Officer for a financial advisory firm here in Indianapolis, Indiana. It is a hybrid office of about 35 people, which is almost completely opposite of the assignment I was in for the last two for the previous two and a half years, which I was the chief operating officer for a fully remote team for an online membership community. And so it’s just really been interesting to kind of adjust back to having a local network and having to put shoes on every day.

    Paige C. Clark 02:27
    So you are working in an office

    Carla H. Hayden 02:31
    I am it’s actually hybrid. So I try to be in the office. At least three days, it’s really been more like four days a week. But I do reserve Fridays for working from home and trying to do very little to no meetings so that I can kind of keep that as my deep work day. It doesn’t always happen. But I’m also chalking that up to I’m still in my first 90 days, I’m coming up on my 90 days next week. So that’s always a whirlwind of activity anyway.

    Paige C. Clark 03:00
    Yeah, yeah, for sure. And I think that no meeting days are always good at my company, we have no meeting Fridays. So every single Friday, we get out and everyone respects it even even so much so that people like apologize when they have to slack you about so I know. Like I respect I respect the boundaries, but I’m like, you know, like it’s its messaging, it would be like if you were in the office, and like you had to ask me a question like that is fair game equally.

    Carla H. Hayden 03:30
    Yeah. That’s so good, though, to have a culture where people really do respect those boundaries. Yeah. Because it it’s so what I have found after being back in an office environment after two and a half, almost three years of not being in one is I do enjoy the buzz. I enjoy that energy and kind of seeing people and having those unintentional connection points have, I’m getting coffee, you’re getting coffee, how was your weekend. But I do find for myself, I have to put like my headphones in and just really focus because I tend to be like, Oh, who’s walking by? Oh. So

    Paige C. Clark 04:10
    I’m the same way. I’ve seen something floating around the internet where it’s like someone who has assigned tape to the back of their chair and said, like, Please don’t disturb me, I will talk to you and lock you up. I worked.

    Carla H. Hayden 04:23
    It is a unique thing for me because my title My role is Chief People Officer. And so I do feel torn on on a lot of days where my job is the people, I’m the Chief of people. And so if the people need me, I want to be available. And also there is tenacity type work to be done. Even in my job. It’s not all meetings. And so I do have to be a grown up about my own schedule and just block those times. And just like what you were saying with your office, it’s people are pretty respectful about

    Paige C. Clark 04:57
    that. Yeah, yeah. And when thing I noticed when you were just talking is you talk about their your assignment, which that language really intrigues me. You’re not saying my new job or my career, it’s your new assignment? Can you tell them more about that?

    Carla H. Hayden 05:13
    Yeah, I think this came about a number of years ago for me, and, and it really came from a place of seeking the Lord for, you know, I think a lot of us sometimes grow up in a faith or even come to faith. And we’re wondering, like, what is my call, what’s my calling, and it’s this really big, ominous, like, if I get it wrong, it’s like, hitting the wrong button. And really, God just in his kindness, and his graciousness towards me, really led me down a path of understanding that my, my calling is the same as yours as a believer it is to bring glory to God, it’s to be an imager of God, that’s my calling. But the way in which I’m going to do it could look very different than the way it’s going to look for you. And, and that really came to a place also, when I went through some a relational change. I was, as I mentioned, I’m a single mom, but I wasn’t always a single mom. And during that time of change, and transition and grief, I was really seeking the Lord for like, is, is this it? So I now have to check a different box on a on a piece of paper that, you know, when it comes to my status. And is that it like that’s, that’s the end of my call. That’s it. And what I realized is that even things like marriage, like parenting, like your bank account, those types of things that are important, and weighty in this world, but temporal nonetheless, they are just our assignments and assignments, they come and go, they have start times and end times. God doesn’t always allow us to be privy to what those dates are, right. But it really comes down to understanding that no matter what your assignment is, God is calling us to faithfulness in that assignment. And so that’s really the way that I have approached my jobs, but also just the various seasons of my life. I look at each season and each opportunity, each door that God opens as an assignment and and then seek Him for how to be faithful in in that particular. Yeah, where he’s placing me.

    Paige C. Clark 07:39
    Yeah. And I think that releases so much of the like, kind of paranoia of like, Oh, am I doing what, what God’s wanting me to do? Whatever this is like going back and forth with all those questions, and what really grounds me and all of that is like, there’s nothing I can do to screw up God’s plan. Yeah. That is a very, like freeing sense of like, even if I suck at this assignment, like God is still God at the end of the day.

    Carla H. Hayden 08:13
    That’s right. Yeah. And he is, he’s so gracious. And he’s so merciful to us. And assignments are really opportunity, their opportunity for reward their opportunity for promotion, I don’t just mean that in the job sense. Like, you know, promotion, even when you think about growing up and going to school. You know, you’re moving from grade to grade. And it’s every time you’re stepping into a new grade, there’s some things that you’re like, oh, yeah, I learned that in the last grade. And I’m taking that with me and some things that are just brand new, and you’re not going to be an expert on it on day one, which I think for a lot of us is a really uncomfortable place to be. But it should be an invitation that draws us into a greater intimacy with God of, okay, this is new, but you are not, you aren’t in the dark about how to operate in this assignment. You’ve prepared this for me beforehand. And so my role is just to walk in faithfulness and in relationship with you through this assignment until the end, and that end for some people is, you know, like my mom, she worked for the same company for 50 years, she had one employer her entire adult life. And I’ve probably had 50 employers you know, it’s the opposite. And so it’s it’s not the same for everyone. And I think that that’s just if I were to issue a permission slip today for people you know, by where to put on my mom and Hayden hat and issue a permission slip it would be just be faithful to your own assignment. And, and that comes from the Lord.

    Paige C. Clark 09:50
    Yeah, I think God is doing something I don’t know what it is. But I think he is doing something in the workplace in kind of this idea of like A higher turnover rate for employees, because you don’t hear of people spending 3040 years at a company anymore. You don’t. And it’s not necessarily the regular workplace. And so I think there’s something to be kind of said about that. I don’t know what it is, but I think there’s something there.

    Carla H. Hayden 10:22
    You know, I, I’m really glad that you brought that up, because my role is one of leadership. And I love, love, love leading leaders. And one of the things that I would really encourage leaders in today, Christian leader, specifically, is this idea of that you in your role as a leader of a company of a team of a group, whatever that is, you’re really called by God into an assignment of being a marketplace, shepherd. And so it is. So such a privilege and an opportunity to shepherd people in whatever season they’re in, if that’s their first job, their first big girl job out of college, that’s your opportunity to shepherd a young person in how to carry themselves in the marketplace, whatever your industry may be. If you’re shepherding somebody who is walking toward retirement, you have such an opportunity to help them finish well. And then everyone in between, you know, doing a good job in there every day, and people who want to get promoted and grow in their leadership and management. And, you know, the way that I look at it is, I, there’s just no reason to be upset when somebody wants to leave your company, because they have a, quote, better opportunity. You know, I’ve always, I’ve always really approached my leadership of people as, okay, the Lord has sent you to me for a certain season of time, and maybe that’s six months, maybe it’s six years, whatever that is, but it’s, it’s still just a fraction of time. And how can I help you show up as your full whole self in your job, do you contribute high value to your job, and, and whatever that looks like, because when somebody feels fulfilled in their role, it’s a, it’s a positive cycle, you know, they feel they feel fulfilled, they feel seen, they feel known, they feel wanted and loved, they bring their best self, when they bring their best self, then everybody wins on the team. And so, you know, if that person is there for a short period of time, because God is bringing them there, it could be to heal from a previous toxic workplace or toxic boss, it could be a place of gaining courage and confidence, maybe, you know, they were pursuing something and something happens at their previous employer, or they this is their first time stepping into a role. It could be where it’s a bridge to the next thing, whatever that is, like, there’s just no sense as a leader to be upset when somebody leaves, if they’re good, they’re gonna leave. If they’re good, they’re gonna get poached. And it’s okay, it because God’s going to fill your hopper back up with other people that need whatever you have to offer.

    Paige C. Clark 13:20
    Yeah, and I think, I think there’s a tendency in today’s workplace to try to fit like a square peg into a round hole with it’s just like, constant like promotion, promotion, growth, growth, growth, growth, kind of kind of mentality. And whereas like some of the best leaders I’ve ever had in, in the corporate world are, have said to me, I want you to be fulfilled, and I want you to grow how you want to grow. And if that happens at this company, great, but if it doesn’t, like, like, okay, yeah, you’re free, go, go do what you need to be doing. Because I, you know, I’d much rather have a leader who was encouraging my growth in a in an organic way versus into a forcing kind of trying to make everything that way.

    Carla H. Hayden 14:18
    Right. It really comes down to alignment, right alignment, in your assignment, your company has an assignment, you have an assignment, this could be a season where those two things align. And then there could be a world in which those two things don’t align at some point. And so I I’m always going to be somebody’s biggest support while they’re in my company, I’m going to help to clear roadblocks and obstacles to their success in the company. But when it’s time for them to leave, I’m going to be their biggest cheerleader, you know, and I’m going to help them finish well, because they are going to be launching into something else, even if that’s something else is their own gig. Um, you know, I want them to finish well with where they are. Yeah.

    Paige C. Clark 15:04
    Oh my gosh, there’s so many good things. I’m like, let’s, let’s have you again on Carla. And we’ll just just talk about leadership in the workplace. Let’s see, I feel like that’s a secondary conversation that definitely needs to happen. But let’s talk about you. And so like, you’re in office, you’re in this new gig, you’re finding your flow, you’re finding your rhythm. What does kind of like the day to day of Carlo look like? And how do you make sure that you? This is gonna sound bad? But how do you make sure to keep your faith at the forefront and fit God into the schedule of someone else?

    Carla H. Hayden 15:41
    Yeah, no, that’s a really great question. Well, first of all, I will tell you that just like everyone else, I’ve had to adjust specifically over the last two to three years. And then me specifically, I’ve had to adjust over the last few months of like, like I mentioned that at the top of the show, like, I have to put shoes on now, I have to, I have to a lot for a commute time now where my commute was 10 steps, you know, 10, literal stairs from upstairs to downstairs, and then I’d be in my office. Yeah. I, the way that I go about it. So my everyday looks almost exactly the same in the sense that I wake up and immediately have a cup of coffee. I mean, I’m not coffee with Carla for nothing’s immediately black cup of coffee. It doesn’t have to be fancy, it could be Keurig. It could be pot brewed. It doesn’t have to be you know, I don’t I don’t actually have time for the pour over, like just gives me hot and straight. But cup of coffee. And then I do I have my my time with the Lord. And that’s always in the word, always every single day. But that is a practice and a discipline that is over 20 years in the making. You know, I mentioned that I have young adult children. Now, they weren’t always young adults, they were young at one point. And so I this has been a practice that I have developed over the course of 20 years over the course of multiple and varied seasons of time, a mom of young kids, a homeschooling mom, a mom that had a part time job, you know, a married mom, a single mom being kind of a, you know, just a cog in a wheel to now being a leader in a company and everything in between. And so, you know, the, the what that looks like for me is, I don’t even really think about it anymore in the morning, it is the first thing that I do. And it’s not always a delight, sometimes I’m exhausted. Sometimes I’ve stayed up way too late binge watching something on a school night. And I’m tired. And what I have found recently, is, when that happens, I still have my quiet time. But number one, I will choose to read the word out loud in my out loud voice. So that helps, it helps to keep me a little bit more focused. It also awakens my soul and spirit because there is power in the spoken audible Word of God. And, you know, we know in Hebrews, it talks about faith comes through hearing and hearing by the Word of God. And for me, it’s like I and even if I don’t feel it in my emotions, I believe in that power that’s happening. And so as I’m speaking out, and even if it’s just the Psalms, you know, it doesn’t have to be, you know, Deuteronomy, it could just be you know, and just saying it out loud, and allowing the Holy Spirit to hover over those spoken words and do the work within me and trust it that work. And I have found even just as recently as this week that I wasn’t feeling it when I was starting. But as I got into it, and just again, faithfulness and obedience, just as I got into it, I actually found myself weeping that came out of nowhere. Yeah. And I realized that really what it was, is it was just a tenderizing of my soul and my spirit. And that sometimes when you’re a nine to FiVER, you’re just going, you’re just going going, going from one thing to the next from one meeting the next one email to the next and, and, and then to take that time to stop. It’s a strange, it’s almost like a paradox. It’s like you’re to take the time to stop at the start of your day. And to invite God into that space. And what I love to be there for two and a half hours, yes, but that would require me to wake up at a time that nobody should be up, quite frankly. But, but I do what I can and I trust. I trust that God sees my heart in it, and it’s really it’s, it’s making that time. So yeah, I have it every morning and then I get ready for the day, take a shower, get dressed, put my makeup on. And all that time I’m usually listening to a podcast and so I’m usually listening to either a leadership podcast because As for me, leadership is my craft. And so I want to be better at my craft, I want to sharpen my my skills and my tools. And so I’m either listening to a leadership podcast that is put on by somebody of a shared faith. So not just any leadership podcast, but there’s a lot of great ones by Christian leaders, or I’m listening to a spiritual formation podcast, because sometimes my brain is overloaded with learning of like, how to be a better leader, how to, you know, improve employee engagement, how to do this, and that, and sometimes my brain is like, the can’t take anymore. And so I’ll listen to a spiritual formation podcast, I’ll listen to maybe a message that I might have missed from my church, or you know, some other church or, you know, podcast that talks about the word and I just let it I just let it kind of rain over me as I’m taking a shower, and I don’t Yeah, don’t try to take notes or anything like that. I just trust that what I’m supposed to hear, I’m gonna hear. Yeah. And then my commute to work is about 10 minutes. So long enough where I can enter prepare, as I enter into the day, at that point, I’m usually listening to like worship music or something, just to kind of, again, refocused my heart. And it’s not so long, though that I have road rage. long commutes I cannot. So it’s just the right blend. Yeah. Yeah. And so that’s my day. And then, you know, I’m usually in the office between 830 and nine and kind of there until about five, maybe six, depending?

    Paige C. Clark 21:34
    And, and how do you like, demonstrate your faith in what you do every day? In terms of your work and your job? I mean, I think that, you know, as Christians, we’re called to live a different life than the world around us. And the likelihood is the people around us are not of the same faith. So what does that look like for you?

    Carla H. Hayden 22:00
    First of all, it’s excellence in whatever I’m putting my hands to, not perfection, but excellence, it’s, it’s taking the time it is taking it seriously, I again, I look at it as being an assignment from the Lord. And I want to be a faithful steward, a good and faithful steward of what he’s entrusted to me. And so it, that’s number one, it’s, it’s not slacking off. It’s not, you know, using company time to do personal things necessarily, or, you know, even in this day and age of work life balance, it’s just making sure that I’m getting my work done, you know, that’s 10 o’clock at night, as opposed to 10 in the morning, so be it, but I’m getting my work done. The other thing is, it’s about my attitude and my posture, I think there is ample opportunity to be negative in this world, there’s a lot to be afraid of, there’s a lot to complain about. There’s not a shortage of reasons to gossip, or grown. And so for me, I again, take very seriously my role of being a marketplace, Shepherd, I’m leading those sheep, whether or not they know, that’s what’s happening, right. And so it is leadership by example, it is coming in. And you know, you don’t have to be super sunshiny all the time. But a smile goes a long way, a good morning goes a long way, just those things and, and just having a positive attitude towards problems, you know, having a solutions, minded, you know, being using my creativity to be solutions minded, versus just like getting into the muck in the mire with people. One of the things that I have implemented in the last number of assignments that I’ve had is I do a thing called Coffee with Carla. And what I do is I schedule one to one meetings with each of my employees. And I just use it to get to know them as human people. And so what I believe in those meetings, I mean, we talk about what’s your favorite food, and you know, what’s your favorite music and all that kind of what some would consider surfacey things. But then I get into what’s an accomplishment? You’re the most proud of? What is a fun fact about you? What Yeah, tell me about your Enneagram type of your working genius, and I really take the time to hear their story. I think each person is so fascinating. And when I give them that dedicated hour, where I’m face to face with them, locking eyes with them, I really believe and I pray, Lord, help me to see them the way you see them, because you delight in them, and you’re fascinated by them. And so help me to have a facial expression that reflects that. So that if nobody else in their life or nobody else in their day, sees them that they feel seen by me. Yeah. As a representative of you,

    Paige C. Clark 25:04
    that’s beautiful. And I think too, like, there might be a tendency to kind of overcomplicate faith in the workplace. But I will say like I had a co worker who, whenever she would message you on Slack, she would just be like, hey, Paige, how are you? Or how’s it going? And she wouldn’t get to the next work thing until I answered. Usually, when we’re sending message, Hey, how’s it going? Can you help me with this? Right, like and going down the list? And really, she started with the human approach. Yeah, and started and kind of doing that and adjusting the mindset, in meetings or on in one on ones where we’re like, okay, human first, work second, right. I think that has a really strong impact on our relationships with people.

    Carla H. Hayden 25:57
    It really does. And today, in today’s world, you really can’t have enough empathy for people. And you can’t encourage them too much. You know, these are the two things that for me, well, I guess three, excellence, empathy, and encouragement. That’s what I bring to the workplace as an imager of God. And I’m the only female on an all male leadership team in a pretty male dominated industry. And that’s taken some courage and confidence on my part to be fully female. In that space. Yeah. Which looks a lot like nurturing. Yeah. And what I have found is that, even if it’s foreign to them, they want that they want it. And, and so that is just something that I’ve, I’ve had to lean into and rely on God to give me the affirmation for, because in the beginning, I think it feels a little like, Oh, she’s very empathetic, or, wow, she’s really taking the more human approach, you know, and it’s not that the bottom line and the numbers don’t matter. It’s just that data is more than numbers, data is also story. And kind of leaning into that story side of things with people, not just what are you producing? What are you closing? What do you you know, what are you checking off?

    Paige C. Clark 27:16
    Yeah, and I think too, especially in today’s day and age, with like, being a female in the workplace, I feel like there’s been kind of a trend to have to match your male counterparts, instead of stepping into what you into your fullness as a woman?

    Carla H. Hayden 27:38
    Yes, I agree with that.

    Paige C. Clark 27:40
    I feel like that’s like, that’s exactly what you’re saying of like, it doesn’t look the same. And the fact that you are more nurturing and more, I guess, humanizing isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of fullness in your femininity, or whatever you want to call it. And that’s how you’re called to lead.

    Carla H. Hayden 28:03
    It’s true. It’s true. And we all have the same objectives that we have to meet as a company, right? But the way that we get there could be different. And so again, it goes back to aligning with that company’s values, aligning with how they want to get to the end, that’s really important for me, like in an interview process, those are the things I’m I’m vetting before I take a job, you know, before accepting an assignment is, you know, like, does this is this going to compromise who I am first and foremost, as a Christian? Secondly, is there a place for me here do Are they really going to allow me to be fully me? Yeah, and all that that means?

    Paige C. Clark 28:46
    Yeah, and I think for I mean, I can’t really speak for the male listeners out there. But I from, from what I’ve experienced, good kind of stewardship of your mail. And this in the workplace, looks a lot like strong and thoughtful leadership, in terms of setting the tone for meetings or for conversations on that level, and then also extending, I, I’ve experienced a lot of like, the males extending equal ground in a meeting, if that makes sense. Yeah, of like giving everyone a voice at the table. It might not be weighted equally in their minds, but the good leaders I’ve seen have accounted for all the voices in the room.

    Carla H. Hayden 29:35
    Right? Well, and again, it goes back to walking in excellence in your job, your work is going to speak for itself. So male or female, if you’re not doing a great job. Yes, it you’re going to have a really difficult time gaining the respect of your leadership. But if you’re if you’re doing a good job that’s noticed, especially in this day and age, so

    Paige C. Clark 29:59
    yeah, so So interesting. And I think there’s just like, again, we’re gonna have to have another conversation about male and female energies in the workplace and how to step into that, because that’s a whole

    Carla H. Hayden 30:12
    other thing. That’s a whole nother conversation as

    Paige C. Clark 30:16
    a few conversations.

    Carla H. Hayden 30:19
    Back up could be season three.

    Paige C. Clark 30:20
    Yeah, yeah, exactly. So stepping into your assignment, how would one know what their assignment is?

    Carla H. Hayden 30:29
    That’s a really great question. I, I can’t speak for everyone I know, for me, it has, it has kind of felt and manifested very similarly from from assignment to assignment. And usually it starts with some type of level of discomfort. And I can liken it to, you know, I’ve had three kids, it’s, it’s when you first start feeling those contractions, you’re like, you know, they don’t just come on suddenly, you know, like sharp shooting pain, it’s more of like, a little bit, that doesn’t feel so good. You know, but but you’re still breathing. Okay, you’re walking around, you’re carrying on with life. Yeah. And then it increases over time. And so when I start to experience that, it’s really, it’s, again, it’s an invitation from God into a conversation, like, what’s happening here. And usually, his response to me is like, just start noticing, just start paying attention. You know, and usually, after that, there will be emails that might come from people I haven’t talked to in a while, or, you know, things that might surface random things, podcasts, billboards, like, whatever, where you’re just like, interesting, I’m seeing two or three of the same type of thing, what’s happening. So it’s really just following the breadcrumbs. But for me, it’s, it’s that fanciness, that like level of discomfort, first, it’s having a conversation with God of like, okay, it’s happening. But for anyone who has ever birth to humans, you know, labor could be an hour, it could be a day, like you don’t know, you know, so just because you’re feeling that, I would encourage people, just that initial feeling doesn’t mean turn in your two weeks notice the next day, it’s just an invitation of like, Oh, something is stirring. And so my encouragement in those seasons is like, just stay focused, stay focused, and stay faithful on your job on your assignment, your current assignment, until you actually no. And then things start to open up doors usually start to open up, or I’ll put my feelers out and just say, hey, you know, I might, I might be back on the market soon. If you happen to know of anybody that could use my skills, my experience, let me know, and we’ll just see. Because even when a new assignment is given, like I think about David, like he was anointed king, and then stayed in the, in the, in the shepherd role for many years. Yeah. And so I think, you know, we just there’s, there’s a level of understanding the timing of God and things.

    Paige C. Clark 33:02
    Yeah, yeah, I made a pretty big, I guess, slightly traumatic job change last year. And if anyone wants to go watch my video of like, my current state of mind, it’s on my LinkedIn where I posted a very, like, I probably would not have posted that today. Where I’m like, Is my sweatshirt no makeup on, it was like, 11pm. I was like, highly emotional, but like sitting in my closet talking about, like, how, how I could be really upset about what was happening at work, but also at the same time, God’s peace, and that was so overwhelming. And that was the first time I have ever experienced, like, a peace beyond all understanding.

    Carla H. Hayden 33:53
    I’m so glad that you said that. Because that really is a big part of this for me. You know, I, I follow the piece, not the paper. So for me, sometimes my assignments have seemed like a step back in my career. In some cases, they’ve been a, a cut and pay or a reduction in responsibility. And, you know, I think, from a from a worldly human standpoint, it’s like, You’re going the wrong direction. You need to go up the ladder. And what I’ve said is, I my career has been less climbing a corporate ladder and more scaling a rock wall, like sometimes you’re moving just laterally, sometimes you’re going down and then back up. Sometimes you’re, you know, kind of taking two or three steps at a time just because you happen to get some good footing. And so yeah, I would say like, follow the piece. Don’t follow the paper.

    Paige C. Clark 34:52
    Gosh, that’s good, Carla. And I mean, it’s true and funny enough like I Um, my husband has since I guess, like, repented of his mindset and this in that season, but like, I was like Zen, I was good. I was like, God, you got this? Yeah. And he could not chill with it. He was like, so uneasy in it. And I was like, no, like, it’s fine. Like, but when is it going to be fine? I’m like, I don’t know, God knows, I don’t know. But it was funny to see like a really clear kind of black and white version of like, the two sides of the coin that can happen have like, he was following the paper in that regard of like, Hey, you don’t have another job. You can’t quit it. And I was like, no, like, that’s what God’s telling me to do. So it kind of like makes sense. And yeah. And going down that path.

    Carla H. Hayden 35:52
    Absolutely. And there is a world in which having other mature believers speak into that pray with you through it, you know, and just getting that confirmation. Another thing that for me has God has been so gracious to provide is I get an assignment Scripture before every new assignment. Wow. And I get to hold on to that in the transition phase. Because oftentimes, it’s not as clear cut is like, you’re done here. And now you’re going there there is there’s a phase there’s kind of like a pre during a post. Yeah. And so being reminded in those shakier times of like, I make the right decision, and having the actual word of God, that I can speak over myself, pray over myself put on a post it all the things he has given me one in every job in every assignment I’ve had since 2015. Wow. Yeah, that’s beautiful.

    Paige C. Clark 36:48
    And like something to center yourself on 100%, when like, the times get tough, because like, I feel like there might be the inclination as Christians to be like, Oh, I love my job every single day. And it’s always perfect. And, you know, birds helped me get dressed in the morning, but like, that’s not real. And so difficulty happens. What would you say to someone who’s like, I’m experiencing difficulty in my job? Does that mean I’m in the wrong assignment?

    Carla H. Hayden 37:22
    Not not typically. I would say that the Bible tells us that we don’t battle against flesh and blood, we battle against spiritual forces. And those forces are actively operating in opposition to us inheriting and possessing all that God has prepared beforehand for us to walk in. And so sometimes that difficulty that we’re experiencing, it’s not because we’re doing something wrong. As a matter of fact, it could be because we’re getting closer to stepping into the thing that is right. And I would just remind people that not all stress is bad. There is good stress, like when we think about, you know, people that lift weights, or do you know, weight bearing type workouts, that’s how muscle is built, it’s a breaking down, and then a repairing and rebuilding of those fibers. It’s not always the breaking down. Like we know, like, when it comes to trauma and things it’s like too much too soon, you know, that so we’re not, we’re not talking about chronic stress, we’re just talking about difficulties, inconveniences, pressure, it’s not always bad. It’s, it’s sometimes for our good and for our benefit. And when I think about that I think about well, then what is true in the body is also true for our souls and our spirits that sometimes God does allow us to walk through those hard and heavy times, because he’s using it as a season of training and preparation and strengthening because he knows what’s coming up next for us. And he is actively wanting us to get the reward. He’s actively wanting us to take on greater levels of responsibility. And that’s his way of preparing us for it. And so, you know, again, follow the piece, not the paper, you know, if if it’s hard, but you have that undeniable peace about it, then press in because that’s you’re actually being prepared for something great. upside.

    Paige C. Clark 39:22
    Yeah. And I think once you step into kind of like meditation with God and like with his word, you grow in discernment around God pushing you in a different direction. And then like earthly and spiritual forces pulling you are trying to create a divide. It does feel very different. Yeah. And a lot of it does. Yeah, and a lot of the times I think like where I’m like, Okay, I was a candidate to like, Okay, if I have to ask like, is this God, it’s probably not God. Like, is When I when I got married, I go, how did I know my husband was the right person? Because I didn’t even have to consider is this the right person? I just I just knew it was the right person for me to marry. And so when it comes to God, like, if I have to question like, is this God pulling me in this direction? It’s probably not.

    Carla H. Hayden 40:20
    Yeah, yeah.

    Paige C. Clark 40:21
    So you’ve been mentioning a lot about faithfulness in your assignment? What does that mean, to be faithful in your assignment? And not just to do it?

    Carla H. Hayden 40:34
    Yeah, I think it, I kind of take it back to what I had mentioned a little bit earlier about David, you know, David was a shepherd, first and foremost, and God was using that season of his life seasons of his life to not only strengthen him physically, but to prepare him for how to lead. He was leading actual sheep. And then he was leading the sheep of Israel. And I think about that, because, again, he got anointed, and then it was like, All right, you got to go back to work the next day, you know, and so even if in your heart or in your mind, God’s given you a picture of where you could be or what you could do, whether it’s in your nine to five or your side, hustle, or whatever, you still have today, you still have the work for today that you need to put your hands to. And so faithfulness looks like inviting God in and asking him, how do you want me to partner with you today? What are you doing in your kingdom in the lives of the people that I work with? Or even in my household? And and how do you want me to partner with you in those things? And sometimes that’s send a really well crafted email. And sometimes it’s take a coworker to lunch and listen, and sometimes it’s, you know, yeah, exactly, I could look like a lot of different things, it could look like good craftsmanship. You know, if you’re in the blue collar field, I mean, it’s going to look like that it’s going to look differently for different people. But what it is going to look like is recognizing that we do have a master that is coming back. And that is going to hold us to account for the things that have been entrusted to us, you know, I think about the parable of the talents. And whether you have been given one or five or 10, you have to live in accordance with what you’ve been given. If you’re highly talented and skilled and gifted. You can’t be lazy about that. Because God has gifted you with those things. For other people, the gift isn’t for you, you know, when a tree bears fruit, it’s not for the trees benefit, it’s for others to enjoy. It’s the same thing with the gifts that God’s given us. So whether you’re a writer or a singer, or you’re an executive, or you’re a construction worker, whatever that looks like, the gifts and the skills and the talents and the experience that God has allowed you to have are actually for the benefit of others. He uses it to benefit you in exchange through your paycheck and your benefits and all that kind of good stuff. But faithfulness looks like recognizing that you’re playing a part in God’s plan, and, and recognizing that you going to work every day that there isn’t just the work. There’s the work beneath the work. Yeah, that he’s inviting you into.

    Paige C. Clark 43:38
    Yeah, and I feel like, at least it’s true for me when I was kind of going through like the high school college phase where I was like, What does God want for my life? Kind of what we were talking about the beginning of like, this existential question. And I felt like there was a lot of it might have been self imposed pressure, I don’t even want to say cultural pressure, it was probably just my brain. Like that I kind of realized that got stuck in the mentality that like, if I wasn’t in ministry, then I’m not building the kingdom. And I feel like that’s the furthest thing for for like, from the truth because what what you’re saying is like, it’s not always just about like, what tangible things you’re doing for the kingdom, right? Yeah, because there’s, God works in other like a crazy amount of ways and, and I had a one of the members of my small group she even said, like, God might have had you just for that one. He might have had you there just for the one and if your whole life, you were in that job, and it was just for that one time, and that’s worth it. And that was like whoa, like that took me like, took my breath away. cuz I’m like, man like that is like one, can he do more than one? Of course he can’t. He’s got he can do whatever he wants. But like, maybe it was like a humbling moment of like, maybe I’m just being called to serve one person in my job. And everything that I’m doing is leading up to that moment, or maybe has like, already that moments already passed. And I’m kind of on the tail end of that. Yeah, it’s humbling.

    Carla H. Hayden 45:32
    It’s very humbling. And I think about the scripture in Matthew six that talks about that. God sees what you do in the secret place. And he rewards you openly. And I hope that that comes to bear upon people not as like, you know, but more of like, even when you feel like what does it matter, like, my boss isn’t even noticing that I’m, you know, spending the extra five minutes proofreading this email or you know, whatever that is. But God sees it. God sees everything. He sees the posture of your heart towards your work. So even if externally, you’re doing a good job, he’s also seeing the posture of your heart that your desire to love other people, your desire to serve Him and image him in that way. It it all counts, it all matters. And it’s all it’s all going to be worth it in the end. Yeah,

    Paige C. Clark 46:31
    yeah. I worked at a summer camp one year and they called it bumped the lamp. And like that was the going above and beyond and doing things with excellence was called bumping the lamp. Because here’s a bit of a throwback. The Who Framed Roger Rabbit up. And there’s a scene where Roger Rabbit and I can’t remember the main character’s name are like wrestling and tussling and getting into it and like this back storage room. And Roger hits the lamp, and the lamp swings, but the lamp was on. And they had to they spent hundreds of hours re animating that scene to get the light to swing over the scene. Right? This was back before like, really advanced animation was happening. And it was all because Roger bumped the lamp. And so every time I hear like go that extra little mile do the things with excellence. It’s just a bump the lamp. But no one would ever see that in this film. Now no one ever thinks of that Glee, and it’s not recognized. Gotcha, yes.

    Carla H. Hayden 47:40
    Why I fun fact about me, I read from cover to cover books, I read the acknowledgments section, I read the dedication section, I watch the credits on a movie. And even if I can’t read all those names, I do sit in awe at like, it took this many people like this isn’t. It’s not just the lead actor or actress, it’s not just the name on the front of the book cover that, you know, the author, it’s many, many, many people contributing to that work coming to fruition. And sometimes the contribution is, you know, thank you so so for watching my kids or for you know, for cooking dinner while I went in my hole to write or whatever. And I just think about that. So, you know, we’re gonna be on, we’re gonna be on credit scenes all over the place, and we don’t even know it. And so

    Paige C. Clark 48:33
    that, gosh, that’s beautiful. I actually I’ve thought very similar things with the credits and movies because I’m like, wow, it might not mean a lot to me. It probably meant the world to this person, and this person and this person and this person, and their parents and their parents and their grandma and grandpa and maybe their kids one day. Funny enough, my husband he had to get he’s a trademark lawyer. And so one of his clients had like a trademark problem with a in a movie. And so at the at the end of the credits in one of the one of these movies, it says like so and so is a trademark of Abba and my husband’s like, I made that happen. I was like, I felt so proud. I was like, Okay, so like, this is just like a little disclaimer at the end of the movie, let alone like people who work on the sound and the the props and the wardrobe and all.

    Carla H. Hayden 49:35
    It all matters. It all matters.

    Paige C. Clark 49:37
    It all matters. Well, gosh, you got into a lot of it. But I have a feeling I know what you’re going to say but I want to give you the opportunity to actually say it and add anything else you want to say. But what is something that our listeners can do to implement a faith building discipline or practice into their life or their work? work life, like this week as they’re listening to this?

    Carla H. Hayden 50:03
    Yeah, I mean, I would say, schedule your time with God, you know, have a daily quiet time, if you’re not a morning person, you’re not a morning person, but have a daily time with the Lord. And I really encourage people who, you know, maybe don’t have one yet to schedule it in your calendar, the way that you would a meeting, or an appointment, because that’s what it is it the living God wants to meet with you. He wants to share his heart with you. He wants to bring healing to you by speaking truth over places where lies, you know, might be residing, he wants to be able to share his heart with you for not only you, but for the people that you’re encountering in your job, and it’s going to be the most transformative meeting of your day. So make the time for it. And so I would just say that, and then, as I kind of mentioned earlier, read scripture out loud, like read it with your out loud voice. And even if it’s just, you know, if you’re in a place where you don’t have a lot of space, and there’s other people there, even just reading it out loud under your breath. There’s power in that. And so yeah, I would just say schedule your time with God. And read the word within your out loud voice and

    Paige C. Clark 51:22
    have it in your coffee with Carla so you can have like coffee with God. It’s your one on one time with God.

    Carla H. Hayden 51:28
    It is I have it. It’s been in like it’s literally in my calendar. And it’s just a recurring appointment every single day. You don’t have to reschedule it. I don’t I it’s every day even when I’m on vacation like that. That’s how I start my day.

    Paige C. Clark 51:41
    Yeah. Oh, that’s beautiful. Carla, thank you so much. And we will talk again. I’m like ready to dig into some of these things that we didn’t have time for today. But where can people find you?

    Carla H. Hayden 51:53
    Well, they can connect with me on Instagram. I’m at Coffee underscore with underscore Carla. And also on LinkedIn. I’m at Carla H. Hayden on LinkedIn.

    Paige C. Clark 52:04
    Lovely, thank you so much, Carla, for joining us and we’ll catch you next time. Sounds great. Thanks. Good. Thanks for joining us. If you liked what you were listening to make sure you subscribe and hit those five stars and we’ll catch you on the next episode.